“What did I tell you about learning to take no for an answer, Shemhazai?” He chided me gently. “We’re going to do this my way, and you’re going to be good and take what I give you.”
Gabe’s dominant side wasn’t something I thought I would like. It was so different from how I was.
He wasn’t violent or cruel. He was stern and safe, like his demands were made in my best interest, and if I obeyed them, I would be rewarded with something beautiful and…kind.
It was a foreign concept, and something about that was more exciting than any depraved kink I could have thought up on my own.
He positioned his tip against my hole, and I gasped.
He was so much thicker than his three fingers, and for a moment, I locked up. A flashback hit me so hard that my bones ached with the abrupt memory. Suddenly, it wasn’t Gabe on top of me, but Raz. He was forcing himself inside me, bare and dry, while I screamed in agony beneath him.
“Shemhazai!” Gabe barked, cupping my face in his hands firmly. My eyes rolled back out of my head, and I was met with two glowing orbs of pure citrine.
I was panting, my heart a caged bird in my chest. I fought the overwhelming desire to bolt. Every instinct told me to run, but the gentle rustle of feathers caused me to pause. I couldn’t leave the safety of Gabe’s wings. I would be running directly into my tormentor’s line of sight if I did.
“Where’d you go, baby?”
I shook as terror rang through my body and clawed at the insides of my skull.
“Nowhere good,” I whimpered.
A tear slid down my cheek, and Gabriel licked it up before kissing each of my eyelids.
“He’s not here, baby. He can’t see you. It’s just you and me. I’ve got you. I won’t let him hurt you ever again. You’re safe.”
I shivered, wrapping my arms around his waist and burying my face in his shoulder as I fought back the sickening memories.
Fresh air and firewood.
He smelled like home.
“Do you still want to do this? You can change your mind at any time, Shemhazai,” he murmured softly, and I quivered but nodded.
“Yeah. I need you to take the pain away.”
“Your pain is my pain, baby.” He kissed the side of my face and pressed against me. “Breathe for me again.”
I took in a shaky breath, my face still buried in the soft skin of his shoulder, and on my exhale, he pushed the tip into my slick entrance.
I stretched to accommodate him, and we both groaned as his cock head popped through.
“Fuck, Shemhazai,”he rasped. His voice was gravel, and the way my name sounded when he was lost in lust was like nothing I’d ever heard before.
I’d never liked the sound of my full name. Not since Raziel had ruined it for me. For some reason, Gabriel had always been the exception. I never corrected him when he called me Shemhazai, and at that moment, I realized why.
He made melikethe sound of my own name again, which was something I never thought I would get back.
He paused before going any farther, giving my body time to adjust to accommodate him, and I was so fucking grateful. My eyes stung with the foreignness of his kindness, and I turned my head to catch his lips in mine.
I nipped and sucked at his lips, my tongue seeking its partner, and he kissed me so painfully slowly I felt like I could die.
“Baby, I love you so fucking much. I can’t believe I’m inside you right now.”
“Give me more. I’m ready for more. Please, Gabriel. I want you so badly.”
Gabe immediately obliged, sliding his thick shaft deeper, and my toes curled as he slipped past the aching ball of ecstasy that was my prostate.
“Fuck—that’s?—”
