He clapped a hand on my shoulder and nodded.
“No worries. Still up for shredding again tomorrow?”
My grin widened, and warmth curled in my gut. Jet was a pretty dope dude. “Yeah. Sounds good.”
He winked at me and nodded.
“Later, surf star,” he said, throwing the‘hang loose’hand signal over his shoulder as he walked away, leaving me standing at the grave of the dead man I’d turned him down for.
Alexa Play: She Keeps Me Warm by Mary Lambert
Iwatched from the shadows as Jet walked away, leaving Finn standing alone at my grave.
If I wasn’t already dead, I would be concerned I might die from the intense, conflicting emotions currently raging in my chest.
Watching Jet touch Finn hurt more than drowning had.
I would take a lungful of saltwater over watching someone else touch Finn’s face the way Jet just did.
But… what I was feeling waswrong.It wasn’t fair to Finn.
Jet would beperfectfor him.
He was kind, loyal, funny, and, most importantly,alive.
I knew I could trust Jet to take care of Finn’s heart.
When Jet and I had been hooking up, the only reason things hadn’t gotten more serious than they had was because of me.
Jet would have given me anything I asked for.
Hedidgive me everything I asked for, including time and space, when I told him I wasn’t ready to fully commit to what we had.
He would take care of Finn.
He would never abandon him or make him feel alone in the world…
He was so much better for Finn than I was.
What was that saying?
If you really love someone, let them go?
The thought of letting Finn go made me feel like I was going to die all over again.
He was…
He was like nothing I ever thought I would have in my life, let alone death.
Finn didn’t just light up a room… hewaslight itself.
His smiles were pure warmth, and his playful nature made me want to curl myself around him and protect him from anything that might turn his smiles into frowns.
Watching him stand there, staring at my grave with tears in his beautiful eyes, made my chest so tight with emotion that I felt like I might be sick.
His mop of hair was damp and dark from the ocean, and his wetsuit molded to his perfectly sculpted body like a second skin.
Every inch of him was beautiful to me. Every word he’d ever spoken to me was precious. I wassoirrevocably in love with him that I didn’t even know how to properly manage the emotions that welled when I looked at him.
