My hand was shaking with the effort to pull the goddamn trigger, a literal bead of sweat formed on my brow as I fought with myself.
This wasDamian.
As much as I fucking hated him, there was this seed of loyalty buried deep within my mind. He’d practically raised me. I had spent my formative years looking up to him and doing everything I could to win his approval.
What was I doing here?
I shook my head again, more roughly this time, desperately trying to beat back the doubts as they plagued my mind.
What had I been thinking? I couldn’t kill Damian…
Yes, he was a little abusive, but he alsosaved me.It wasn’t all bad. The bouts of torture had been few and far between, and they were always in response to something I had done wrong.
Damian continued to approach me slowly, his expression twisting into something that looked close tohurt.
Guilt tore through my gut, and I had the sudden, overwhelming urge to lower my gun again.
“Callum. I’m sorry. I know you’re upset with me, and you’re right to be. I went too far.”
I couldn’t even speak. Instead, I growled and switched to a double-handed grip on the Glock. I forced myself to keep the gun trained on him despite the fact that I was noticeably shaking now.
“Callum. Put the gun down. It’s me.” He reached forward and brushed his fingers over my cheek.
I was in a fucking trance. I couldn’t tear my gaze away from his whiskey eyes.
“I’m sorry I lied to you.”
That’s right! That’s why I was so mad; he lied about being involved with trafficking kids!
“You did lie,” I snarled, and he nodded, inching even closer to me.
“I did, but I was just trying to teach you a lesson. You know you need more attention than the others, Callum. I was just trying to help you.”
“What the fuck are you talking about!?” I rasped, ramming the nose of the gun into his chest.
What did child trafficking have to do with teaching me a lesson?
“You asked me if I loved you, and I said no,” Damian whispered, stepping even closer into my personal space. He didn’t seem concerned at all that I had a fully automatic pistol pressed directly against his shoulder.
“I was lying.”
“Wh-what?” I choked.
There was a roaring in my ears.
No. No, no, no…
I suddenly knew what he was going to say, and I didn’t want to fucking hear it.
I didn’t want to hear the words ‘I love you’ for the first time from Damian Ryker.
He stroked my cheek and ran his thumb over my lips in a way that made my stomach churn. I had a brief flash of memory from the nightmare that had led to me almost killing Ryan.
I remembered Ryker’s soft grunts and the sound of flesh hitting flesh.
Had he been… touching himself? To me being tortured?
Since I was a child?
