“I’m tired,” I said, not really wanting to see what kinds of horrors he had planned for me in the fucking library. Maybe if I could get some time alone, I could try to track down Art and see if he could help me somehow.
For a moment, Ramel actually looked concerned. He held a hand up to my forehead.
“Are you feeling okay?” he asked, frowning. “You shouldn’t be tired, you just woke up.”
I scowled at him, “I don’t know. Maybe it’s the non-stop trauma,” I snapped, and he sighed.
“It doesn’t need to be traumatic, Lilith. Stop fighting it and just accept that this is your life now. You might find you enjoy it. You might even have fun.”
Was that a fuckingjoke?I just glared at him, clenching my fists at my sides. I didn’t want to risk another punishment, and I didn’t have anything nice to fucking say. It was safer to just keep my mouth shut.
He sighed and gently rubbed a thumb over my cheek, kissing me softly on the forehead. “We won’t be at the library for long. When we’re done, we can go back to the room for a nap,” he said, and I laughed though there was no joy in it.
“Sure, a‘nap.’”I said, giving sarcastic air quotes. He chuckled.
“Tell you what, I’ll make you a deal. You come with us to the library and at leasttryto enjoy yourself, and I’ll keep my hands to myself while you rest. Deal?”
I narrowed my eyes at him, wondering how my life had gotten to the point where I needed to make deals with the literal fucking Devil just to take anap.
“Fine,” I snapped, and he grinned, holding his hand out for me to shake. I took it and felt him squeeze my fingers gently.
“Good girl,” he purred, pulling me into his side and wrapping his arm around my shoulders. “Don’t forget the part about trying to enjoy yourself, though. You’re going to love the library. It’s my favorite part of the manor.”
“Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by rulers as useful.”
—SENECA THE YOUNGER
Iwas still furious with Ramel for the stunt he pulled at breakfast, but as we followed Shem into the library, I was forced to put my anger aside.
The library was like nothing I had ever seen before. I couldn’t tell if there was no ceiling or if the ceiling was just made of glass. The endless night sky twinkled over us, and it felt like walking into a solarium. Lacquer-black bookshelves spiraled upwards like we were inside a macabre conch shell crusted with books instead of sand. Little floating green flames bobbed around the ethereal midnight space, illuminating cozy nooks that had been cut directly into the floor or the walls for reading.
The floor in the center of the cylindrical space was what really took my breath away. The library was divided by several indoor canals filled with black, sparkling water. There were even little bridges in place to make it easier for guests to travel through the space. In the center of the main floor was a massive, circular glowing dais. The light that shone from the raised moon-like platform leisurely bled from gold to violet to green and back to gold again.
“Wow…” I breathed, and both Ramel and Shem smiled at me, their expressions kinder than usual.
“We figured you would like it,” Shem said, touching my chin gently. I jerked away from him, and he dropped his hand and frowned. Thankfully, he didn’t comment. Instead, he turned to Ramel.
“I think you should give Lil a tour and explain how things work here. As we go, we might find someinterestingreading material.” He gave Ramel a mischievous grin. “You never know what the library might show you.”
A sinister smile curled across Ramel’s face. Shem winked at me, and I gasped as he suddenly shifted into his cat form, trotting off into the stacks. The sight of him in his cat form sent a twinge of sadness through my heart. I missed having him as my cat. He had been the one comfort and constant I had in life, and now that was gone too. Forcing myself not to allow my thoughts to show on my face, I turned to face Ramel.
He threaded his fingers through mine and tugged me deeper into the space, heading down to the main floor in the direction of the glowing pedestal.
I peered down into one of the canals that seemed to be running with black ink and gasped again. Inside the black water were glowing, orb-like organisms. They reminded me of jellyfish, the way they dreamily bobbed and flowed through the water.
“What are those?” I asked breathily, enthralled with the beauty of it all.
“Souls,” Ramel replied, smiling at me. He was watching me absorb my surroundings with such a tender, affectionate look on his face. I realized he was really enjoying this, which surprised me. I knew he liked to hurt me, but I hadn’t expected him to also enjoy showing me beautiful things.
I frowned at him, turning back to peer into the inky water again. One of the souls bobbed merrily through the channel like a little amoeba.
“Are they bad souls?” I asked, curious as to why they were in Hell.
“Not all of them. Souls come here immediately after death, and my team sorts them for judgment. The ones that pass the criteria provided by Yahweh are sent to Heaven for a brief period of time before being reincarnated. The rest of them… Well, we’re in no shortage of playthings. They wait in the sea of souls for myself or one of my fallen to choose them for their turn to be tormented.” He gave me a dark look, and I narrowed my eyes on him.
“Like how you torment me?” I asked, unable to keep the sadness out of my voice. Ramel stepped closer to me and curled his finger under my chin, tilting my head up to face him.
“No, Lilith. Not like how I torment you.” His expression grew serious, and his eyes dropped to my mouth. He leaned forward and pressed his lips softly against mine, gently stroking my jaw before pulling away. “What I think might help you, Lilith is a change in perspective,” he said, tugging me away from the edge of the channel and steering me toward the large glowing dais in the center of the room.
