He grunted as he stroked us both through it and collapsed on top of me. I was gasping for breath still. He kissed and sucked up the side of my neck, a deep growl rumbling in his chest.
“I’m going to keep you safe, Lilith. I promise.” He nipped at the corner of my mouth and pressed his fingers into my jaw, turning my head to face him.
I stared at him as he stroked the side of my face and drank me in.
“How can I trust you after everything you’ve done to me?” I whispered. I felt like I was floating in the aftermath of the orgasm he had given me, but he was so sincere and earnest that I suddenly wanted to hear from his own mouth how he expected me to move on from everything he had done to me. I knew he had his memories back, and he seemed to regret his actions, but I still only knew him as a monster.
Reaching out a trembling finger, I touched his cheek, shuddering at the roughness of the stubble I found there. He closed his eyes and pressed his face into my hand. For a moment, he stayed there. Finally, he swallowed and caught my gaze once more.
“I don’t need you to trust me, Lilith. I just need you to stop fighting this. The trust will come in time. Just stop making me hurt you and submit.”
The small hesitant piece of affection that had been trying to bloom in my heart suddenly froze over. I felt a tear slide down my cheek. Who was I kidding? He wasn’t any different. He was the same. My captor. My demon.
“Can’t you see that’s the very reason I can’t?” I whispered. “You say you love me, but you can’t force me to love you back, Ramel. I’m notmakingyou hurt me. You can choose to stop. You can let me decide for myself what I want instead of forcing your will upon me.”
He brushed away my tear with his thumb, bringing it to his mouth and licking the salty drop away. For a moment, he looked so sad it nearly broke my heart, but I steeled myself against the unwarranted feelings of compassion for the monster who had spent my whole life destroying me.
“If you’re looking to trust me, Lilith, then you can trust this: I will never stop trying to force you to love me. I will push and bend you to my will until I’m the only thing you see and the only one you want. One day you will willingly be mine again. Until then, I will take whatever parts of you I can steal because I promised you forever, and forever starts today… whether you’re ready for it or not.”
I stared at him, not knowing how to respond or how to feel about what he had just said.
“Now,” he continued, stroking my face again gently, “open your mouth and stick out your tongue.”
I tried to argue, but he shoved two fingers down my throat. I coughed and jerked away, but he slipped his other hand around the back of my neck and held me still. I panicked and struggled against him, but he just held me tighter, forcing me to swallow his fingers.
“Shh, shh. Breathe. You’re alright. This is nothing compared to what this throat is going to swallow later. Try to relax,” he murmured. He watched me carefully as I worked to calm my breathing. I forced myself to still, and he pressed his fingers deeper, causing me to whimper.
“There you go. Good girl.” He pulled his fingers out slightly before sliding them back down my throat. I closed my eyes and did my best to breathe through my nose. “Now that I have your attention,” he chuckled, and I glared at him while he slowly fucked my throat with his hand.
“Listen closely because I’m only going to say this once. How the rest of this day goes will completely depend on you. Shem and I have plans to show you the rest of Hell. We’re preparing for Samhain and your birthday. I think you’re going to really like what we have planned for you. However, if I get any more attitude, I will chain you to the bed and fuck the back talk right out of you. Is that understood?”
I wanted to bite down on his fingers but knew all that was going to get me was tied up. Instead, I nodded. He smirked at me and pulled his fingers out of my mouth.
“Let’s give you a test, shall we?”
I scowled at him but kept my mouth shut.
“Who do you belong to?” he asked.
“You,” I bit out, and he nodded.
“That’s right. If I tell you to do something, what are you going to do?”
I winced but told him what I knew he wanted me to say. “Do it.”
“What if I tell you to do something you don’t want to do?”
I sighed, “I’m going to do it anyway.”
“Are you going to complain and whine about it?”
“No.”
“That’s right. You’re just going to obey.” He stroked the side of my face and kissed me gently. “If you can be good, I promise we’re going to have a really nice day, deathtrap.”
“I don’t understand how you could tell me that you love me, then treat me like I’m your property or something,” I said softly, and he pulled me into him, kissing me gently on the top of my head while he ran his fingers through my hair.
“It’s because I love you that I treat you like this.” He pulled back and curled his finger under my chin, tilting my face up. He placed another devastatinglygentle kiss on my lips. “You’re human and fragile, and right now I know what’s better for you than you yourself do. I refuse to let anything happen to you before Samhain.”
