“Nothing to be sorry for.” I smile at him, bumping my shoulder against his. He’s at the other end of the house. I’d have to be screaming at top volume for him to hear me.
Getting back to my story, I continue. “We worked in the garden today, then I went for a long run with the guys. It helped me process everything, and I cried a bit at the end of the run. I wasn’t sad, just releasing all the emotions about last night.”
“How do you feel now about what happened?” Sarah asks.
“Um, I’m more pissed at whoever drugged Seb and at Cara, than what happened to me. It was scary when he pinned me to the sink, but I got away from him and came out of my panic.”
“You certainly did. I’m proud of you for stopping your panic attack. I understand why you are focusing on Seb and Cara, but I’d like to focus on you. He triggered you, Summer. How do you think you will feel when you seehim again?”
“I’m not sure. I don’t want to be scared of him or panic. Right now I’m angry with him.”
“I expect you will feel uneasy, which is okay. Is there anything that can help you with facing him next?”
“Well, I know the guys will be nearby, and will always come for me, so I’m not alone. Zander and Troy will too. We discussed the guys being with me if Ben is nearby, so he can’t corner me.”
“Good. Anything else?”
“Um, I got away myself. I think that fact will help.”
“She’s going to train in self-defence too. She hurt her hand throwing a punch last night,” Zander adds.
“That should help you feel more confident in your abilities, Summer. You already have lots of tools in place to help you deal with Ben. Try to remind yourself of them before school on Monday.” I agree to do so. She asks if there is anything else to discuss, so I ask her if she could speak with Zander.
“Of course,” she says. “Zander, I’m guessing you’re feeling various emotions right now?”
“Too many,” he nods.
“Can you tell me what emotions are running through you?”
“Scared for Summer. Frustrated that I can’t lock this kid up and throw away the key. We have no recourse here, and it pisses me off.”
“Understandable,” she nods. “Remember, you have a remarkably strong young woman sitting beside you. I’m not sure there is anything she can’t overcome.”
“She shouldn’t have to,” he mutters.
“In an ideal world, no, but life doesn’t work that way. Summer, would you mind if I talk to Zander for a few minutes alone?”
“No, go ahead. I’ll watch some tv in my room,” I say, giving his hand a squeeze. “Thanks, Sarah.”
“You’re welcome, Summer. Call if you need me,” she smiles.
I leave Zander and Sarah and head to my room. Lying back on my bed, I stretch my legs some more. My phone rings, so I pick it up to see it’s Seb. “Hi Hurry.”
“Hey Sunshine. How are you?”
“Okay. I just talked to my therapist about everything.” I tell him as I continue to stretch out my thighs.
“Did it help?” He asks. Hmm, he sounds off, not surprising after what he’s been through.
“Yeah, it did. What do you need, Hurry?”
“I’m feeling freaked out about everything. What would have happened if you weren’t there?”
“I was there, and she was stopped. Remember, E was on his way to find you too,” I reassure him. Although we experienced different situations, I understand the complex emotions that can surface after realizing a violation has occurred.
“Yeah, I guess,” he mumbles.
“We can’t spend our lives worrying about the what-ifs, Hurry. It’ll drive us crazy, and then we aren’t living. Be grateful it turned out the way it did and try to move forward. I don’t think any of us will party or drink for a while. If and when we do, we’ll take more precautions so nothing can happen again.”
