The old insecurities reared their ugly heads when he did that. But only for a split second. I know he didn’t give me extra space because of my body shape or size. He told me in one of our earliest conversations that my form is pleasing, and since hell demons are always honest, sometimes to a fault, I know he meant it. More important, though, is that I’m happy with myself again. The inside and the outside.
The journey has been easier than I thought. Being part of an amazing community and surrounded by great friends has been a big part of it.
Another thing that’s happened more easily than I thought possible—being ready for a relationship. The immediate attraction to Amazra I felt the moment I met him has grown more powerful every day, and I’msoready to explore it in a physical way. I want more than the sex part with him, a lot more, but a broken heart isn’t on my personal bingo card. Still, I’d take whatever he offered because I know it’d be all hecanoffer.
Of course, that’d require him offeringsomething. Anything more than short daily interactions in the bakery and longer conversations when I not-so-accidentally encounter him every Sunday in the fields between our cabins.
We’ve learned a lot about each other while looking up at the sky together. It took some gentle persuasion, but he even told me a little, just the barest outline, of his duties in the hell realm. I’m sure he expected me to get up and run away that day.
In hindsight, maybethat’swhat he wanted. Not the reassurance and acceptance I gave. Maybe “more” just isn’t in the cards for us, and I should accept it and stop putting myself in his path.
“You have the number on your card.” Amazra’s deep voice snaps me out of my droning inner monologue.
“Oh. Which number was it?” I ask, taking advantage of this valid excuse to look at his face. “Sorry, I sort of zoned out for a few minutes.”
“B-12.”
“Thanks.” I dab the square and attempt to focus on Holly as she spins the bingo ball cage with enough gusto to make it shift position on the table.
“Fatigue is understandable and requires no apology. You have expended much energy creating this event for so many to enjoy.”
“Have you enjoyed it?” The question slips out before I get a block in place between my emotions and my mouth. The only saving grace? He’ll take the question at face value, without registering the neediness in my tone.
“I do not regret attending.”
“I guess I’ll take that as a small win.” Lightly shaking my head, I dab another square on my card. “Speaking of winning, I only need one more number. I’ve never had a card with this many numbers called so quickly. You must be a good luck charm.”
He makes a low, nonverbal rumbling sound. “I am not responsible for the outcome of this game or the others.”
“It’s just a phrase,” I say, smiling at him. “Another of the things we mortals say nonliterally.”
“G-50,” Holly calls.
Amazra’s gaze falls to my card, his eyes flickering when he meets mine again. “You have won.”
“I did?” Checking my card, I let out a squeal while popping up from my seat. “Bingo!”
Everyone in attendance cheers, my friends doing so the loudest. On my other side, Amazra rises and steps out of the way so I can go to the gazebo.
“I probably shouldn’t accept the prize since I’m the event organizer,” I tell him as I ease past him. “But there’s only one prize left in the bag and I know what it is. Something I’ve had my eye on for a while, so I’m not going to turn it down.”
“You deserve all joy bestowed on you, Lilah.”
The urge to touch him is strong. On the chest. A hand. His handsome face. Anywhere and everywhere. “Thank you,” I say instead, giving him a big smile before I bound away.
The moment I reach the top step of the gazebo, Holly pulls me in for a bestie hug. “Congratulations!” She plants a big kiss squarely on my cheek, with an accompanying“Mm-wua!”sound. “Tonight was so much fun! Thank you for all of your hard work,” she says after releasing me.
I’m greeted with cheers and applause by creatures I didn’t know existed a few months ago. Now they’re my neighbors. My friends. “Thank you, everyone, for coming out for what I hope will be the first of many bingo nights, and for the incredible welcome to this amazing community I’m so happy I get to call home.”
Dauphine, Lexi, and Flora are all clapping heartily and grinning widely. Flora’s fairy wings flutter at her back, lifting her off the ground by her aisle seat on the opposite end of the table from Amazra. Evenhislips have a noticeable upward curve.
“Before we wrap things up,” Holly says when the applause tapers off, “let’s see what you’ve won.”
Reaching into the bag for the last piece of folded paper, I look into the crowd at Flora and give her an extra-large smile. I’ve made a point of making sure each business received a good shout-out for their donations, and the remaining prize is from her store, Fae-vorite Things.
Unfolding the thick cream paper, I draw a breath in preparation for announcing the beautiful pink notebook with gilded edges, gold embossing, and matching fountain pen.
But that’s not what’s written on the paper in my hands.
