“And you’re sure you don’t want a script?”
The uncertainty in Akari’s voice conveyed how much happier she would have been if I had ceded to the request.Ironically, I could have asked Caroline to write one for me.As I recalled, it was a role she was more than qualified for, but in the end, I opted for a more spontaneous approach.I’d always had a way with words—it was one of the reasons Ian had always kept me at his side—and I was sure those same words wouldn’t abandon me when it counted.
“Yes.”My gaze flitted to Caroline, who was waiting on a chair between us and the impromptu film shoot.“I had a great speech writer once, but I think this will work better if it comes straight from the heart.”
“The heart?”Akari’s brow furrowed.
“Yes.”I was tired of being second-guessed.I’d come from a land where few had the authority to question me, and I found myself in a place where everyone seemed inclined to.Even if I dodged prison, civilian life was going to take some getting used to.“I have been well-trained in the media, and I know how to express myself, and remember, I also know Ian and how to appeal to him personally.”
“Yes, I am sure, but please ensure you include the key points we talked about.”Akari was still prattling on, but I was hardly listening as I moved toward Caroline.“Your error, your contrition, and your desire to serve your country again.”
“I have it handled.”
Peering back at her, I hoped my irritation wasn’t too obvious.I needed to keep the ICC’s judges on my side, but as the man used to giving orders, rather than receiving them, I supposed old habits died hard.It was going to take time to get used to being told what to do, especially by a woman.
“Are you ready?”Caroline’s lips curled as she reached for my hand, and rising from her chair, she glanced up at me.
“I think so.”
I’d been absolutely certain when Akari questioned me, but Caroline had a way of quietly disarming me and demanding the truth.I was capable of giving Tom what he wanted and provoking a response from Ian, but that didn’t mean there wasn’t unease stirring inside of me about the prospect of having to.
Reaching out to the regime I’d just fled with her seemed innately wrong.We’d taken huge risks to get away from Britain, and I was on the brink of a plan that would see me back in its territorial waters, at least for a limited time.In the bubble she cast over me, I couldn’t quite wrap my head around what needed to be done.
“You’ll do amazingly.”She pressed a light kiss to the front of my shirt.“As always.”
The smile that tugged at my lips was involuntary.It was going to be odd performing in front of so many people again.I’d assumed the days of speeches and cameras were behind me, but there was one last show to be enacted, which involved luring a president with a promise of repentance.Whatever the outcome, I’d always be grateful for Caroline’s love and support.
“Thank you.And you’ll be here waiting for me.”Hooking one finger under her chin, I lifted it gently, forcing her to meet my eyes again.“As always.”
“Yes, I’ll be here.”
Fear swam in her gaze, the look of it furrowing my brow.It was the type of latent anxiety I hadn’t seen in her since we’d first arrived in Zurich, and one I’d hoped we’d have left behind us for good.I lamented its return, praying I’d do nothing else to inspire the emotion in her.
“And remember, I have to say some things for the camera that you might not want to hear.”I skimmed the pad of my thumb over her soft skin, reveling in the feel of her.“Please know I don’t mean a word.”
She nodded wistfully.
“I need you to understand that, sweetheart.”My tone was emphatic.“I’m only telling him what he wants to hear.Nothing more.”
“I know.”Her lips twitched, but her smile was still sad, the sight twisting the knife in my rising apprehension.
“It’s okay,” she whispered.“I love you, Sir.”
“Mr.Har-per.”Tom, who couldn’t have been older than twenty-five, clapped his hands together to attract my attention.I wasn’t sure where he originated from, but his English seemed slow compared to Kaspar, Elsa, and the judges I’d interacted with, and somehow, he’d acquired a curious and annoying habit of separating the two syllables of my surname, which exaggerated the word every time he said it.“We are ready for you.”
Leaning down to kiss Caroline’s crown, I released her hand and made my way past the cameras, dodging wires en route.It hadn’t been so long before that the cables I’d been avoiding had been attached to my chest, yet in twenty-four hours, everything had changed.Turning to face Tom and blocking out the glare of the artificial lights he’d erected, I was on the verge of offering the biggest apology in political military history in the hope that I could lure my old boss into a false sense of conceited security.
On paper, the strategy was seamless, but waiting there, I suddenly wished that everyone who wasn’t a crew member would clear the area.Apologies weren’t generally my style, and having to offer one in front of Caroline and Akari, as well as everyone else assembled, was excruciating, but I’d conceded to the ICC’s request for a reason.Getting Ian back on side was about more than only my ego.It could buy me legal impunity and a life with my little girl, with the added bonus that it was my one genuine chance to help put him behind bars and provide whatever was left of my soul with the opportunity for a reprieve of sorts.
After everything I’d done, it was my shot at something resembling redemption.
“Okay, everyone!”Tom glanced around the small team of sound, lighting, and camera crews gathered before his attention landed back on me.“Is everybody ready?”
Mumbles of acquiescence rumbled around the place as Tom nodded.
“Okay, this is Har-per for the ICC, take one, in five, four...”
His hand rose so we could all see his fingers counting down from three to one, those same digits swinging in my direction as the room fell silent around us.Time protracted as I stared past the blinding lights of the cameras and imagined the overweight, balding Ian being right there in front of me.It wasn’t so difficult to achieve after so many years of having to deal with him.
