It would’ve been so easy to kill Keanu—just like last time. I felt calm. Too calm. Irvin makes killing feel logical. Reasonable.
His fingers stroke the back of my head. He believes it was right that I killed Emerson, and that if I’d let him kill Keanu, he would’ve been justified.
I open a door inside myself, the one I can’t close.
I realize I’m no longer Paige.
I’m no longer the scared teenager who lived in fear, always on edge, always waiting for her life to be snatched away.
I’m Lilac Ashford now—aware of who I am.
I’m the girl who conquered the real monster that haunted me for years.
The girl still consumed by darkness, but who doesn’t act on it.
I love the new me. The damaged me.
Irvin leans down and kisses my cheek.
I sit up and grip his hand. He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear.
“Irvin, I need to tell you something.”
He straightens his shoulders.
I smile faintly. “I had a sexual relationship with Emerson, and it turned destructive. He raped me. He was obsessed with me beyond reason. I didn’t know he was part of a secret society that killed my parents. I fell in love with a psychopath. And I—” I swallow. “I manipulated him the night my parents were murdered.”
“It’s not—”
“No. I need to be honest.”
I take a breath. “He wanted us to be public. I told him no—my parents wouldn’t approve. They were wealthy, high status. Everyone knew them. It would’ve destroyed their image.”
My throat tightens. “I told him that if my parents were gone, we could be together. I didn’t mean it. I was trying to break up with him. It was an excuse. He was always forceful. He never knew when to back off.”
My heart pounds. I swallow my tears before continuing.
“I remember him leaving my bedroom. Then—before I knew it—I heard gunshots. I ran downstairs and saw my parents’ bodies on the floor.”
Irvin doesn’t blink. Doesn’t flinch. He just listens.
“I asked him what he’d done. He told me we could be together now. He tried to convince me it was my fault, that it wasn’t supposed to end like this.” I inhale sharply. “I didn’t know what he meant at the time. He was talking about the secret society.”
I steady myself.
“I told him I wasn’t going to be with him. I wasn’t going to marry him. He was furious. He tried to kill me that night. I ran all the way to the police station and turned him in.
“It made headlines everywhere. I had to disappear. So I faked a death certificate—said Paige died by suicide.”
Irvin cups my face and kisses me softly.
“I’m Lilac now. Paige is dead. Paige was running from her past. Lilac embraces it. She accepts what happened. She has now faced her past.”
Irvin yanks me into his arms. “I’m proud of you, Lilac Ashford. So proud of my princess.”
I’m proud of myself too.
And I accept all of me.
