I grab him by the collar and snatch my gun from my holster, nudging it to his forehead. “If you’re fucking with me, then I’m going to blow your brains out.”
He laughs like a hyena and pushes me off him. “I’m really not. This guy has been speaking to her, and he seems like a nice, sweet guy she would allow to take her out on a date.”
I know he’s fucking with me. It’s his way of trying to make me come to my senses because the thought of her being with someone else really drives me up the fucking wall. And, she’s is stubborn like me so she’s not going to come to me. I place my gun back into my holster.
“So what are you going to do, Demonte? Let another man take your woman? Or wallow in your shit and let her slip through your fingers?”
Autumn
I got a new job working at the library, and this time, my boss is a woman, and she doesn’t bother me. I never want to put myself in a position again where I might get raped. I know it’s not my fault what happened, but I need to be more careful of who I’m around, so I bought myself Mace and a Taser gun. I haven’t seen or heard from Viper since I saw him at the bar, and I’m tired of walking around with this big-ass hole in my heart. I don’t know what to do. I want to call him to see how he is doing, but I don’t. I’ll give him his space. I’m waiting for him to come back to me. I’m not mad at him for killing Mr. Arthur anymore, but I’m sad for Mr. Arthur because all he wanted was love, I suppose. I wish I could have picked up the signs of him trying to let me know he wanted me, and the minute I felt uncomfortable, I should have had my guard up and left. I should have known by the way he was being too nice that he had a crush on me.
As I pick up the books in the kids section, Leon, one of the guys I work and have lunch with, helps tidy the reading area. I’ve been only working here for two weeks, and I enjoy it. I might look into working as a librarian. I don’t know yet. I have so many things I want to do with my life, like travel and backpack around Europe.
My phone rings, and it’s my aunt, Savannah. The last time I heard from her was when I received my acceptance letter from New York University. I exhale, my finger hovering over the green button on the screen. I debate if I should answer her call, but if I don’t, then she’ll pop up like last time, and honestly, I don’t want to see her. I tap the button, and her voice booms as I place the phone against my ear.
“Hello, Aunt Savannah.”
“How are classes?”
I was supposed to start my classes a week ago, but I dropped them. I place the phone between my shoulder and face as I place the books onto the rack.
“I haven’t started. I dropped my classes. I don’t want to start school. I want to find my own way,” I tell her.
“What is wrong with you? I knew you dating Demonte would get in the way of your succe—”
“Aunt Savannah, please back the fuck off, okay. This is my life, not yours.” I grab my phone and use my other hand to rub my forehead, closing my eyes as I take a deep breath and try to keep myself calm. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude, but I meant what I said. Please, back off. I know you’re scared I won’t be able to make it in this world, but I can. And please don’t bring Demonte into this—it was my choice. And he was right. I need to stop living up to your expectations and do what I want.”
She’s silent for several moments. “I want the best for you.”
“But don’t you think I know what’s best for me?”
“I’m so sorry, Autumn. I really am.”
“I know. Please, give me space.”
“I will, I promise. I love you, bumblebee,” she says, and her voice breaks. “We haven’t talked much since I came back from seeing you.”
“I know, and I’ll take a trip to see you soon, I promise. I have to go. I’ll talk to you later.” Then I hang up the phone and place it in my pocket.
I work through the day, and once my shift is over, I close the door, place my hand on my Taser gun, and stroll onto the concrete.
The August breeze hits me, the air a bit nippy but not enough to need a jacket.
I walk to Raven’s apartment, and I feel as if someone is watching me. I’ve been feeling that since I started working here. I turn around and study the crowd before my eyes snap onto Viper. He’s staring at me, and his face is unreadable. I walk up to him, and he glances down at me.
“You been following me home. Haven’t you?” I say, crossing my arms across my chest.
“Yeah. You have a problem with it?” He taps his finger on my nose, and my cheeks burn.
“No. I’m glad you’re looking after me.”
We stride side by side, and I don’t know what to say to him or where to begin, so I’m going to say whatever pops up in my head.
“Aunt Savannah called. I told her I’m not going to start school.”
“Oh? You’re finally standing up to her.”
I wiggle my eyebrows. “Yeah, I had a boyfriend who told me that I should follow my dream.”
