ONE
KITTY
2022
Playlist recommendation:
I’d Rather Overdose - honestav, Z
“Is that a dick, or is he just happy to see us?”
“George, I’m worried. You’re a nurse as well as the possessor of a penis that Iknowis fully functioning because Millie’s pregnant and Sammy just turned eighteen months old, but you’re unsure if the man in bay four is swinging his in a circle? Is it time for a refresher course on male anatomy?”
George, ignoring me entirely, rubbed his chin. “I don’t care that it’s unprofessional. I’m both jealousandrelieved that Millie is on her sabbatical today. After the shift we’ve had, that’s too much for my brain to cope with.”
Hiding a laugh—hey, someone had to be the professional here—I yanked on the bay’s curtain. “Stop leering.”
“I’m not leering! I’m 94.5% straight. If anything, I’m impressed and feeling very sorry for my wife.” Said wife must have realized herears were burning because George’s pager beeped. “Shit, that’s Millie. Will you cover for me? Says she’s experiencing Braxton Hicks.”
“Sure thing.” This was the fourth time she’d paged. “Give her my love.”
Millie, George, another friend of ours, Lara, and I had all met while we’d worked at a coffee joint in our first year of nursing school. That meant I had a personal investment in Millie’s current sitch—and not only because I’d been promised godmother bragging rights.
Mid-run, George huffed out, “You’re a lifesaver!”
Didn’t I know it.
With him gone, I stuck my head between the gap in the patterned curtains and found the not-so-strange stranger maintaining a perfect 360° helicopter.
Still.
I blinked a few times, wondering what the underworld would do if they could see Custanzu Valentini in action.
I considered myself lucky that I’d sworn off men unless they were finance bros or I might, just might, have tugged at my scrubs’ collar and resented the lack of AC. Thankfully, obstinacy put a halt to any attraction.
Even if that ink on display was?—
No.
I wouldn’t eventhinkthe word ‘yum.’
There was nothing ‘yum’ about this situation. The disturbingly large penis on display served only as a severe reminder that the astronauts on the International Space Station were less high than him.
“Sir?” No response. “SIR!” I barked, bringing out my ‘big sister’ voice.
It worked. Of course.
He stilled mid-thrust. Then,fuck, dropped face first. I managed to bite back my surprised yelp but dropped to my knees to help when the idiot started performing a set of goddamn push-ups!
“CUSTANZU VALENTINI,” I snarled. “You will behaveyourself or I’ll…” I struggled to find a consequence for a thirty-plus-year-old man who had a forty-thousand-dollar watch strapped to his wrist. “…tell your great-uncle you were rude to a lady!”
I winced when he collided with the linoleum via his forehead. Then he rolled over to stare at me with bleary eyes. “You knowProzio?”
Prozio?
I stacked my hands on my knees. “I know Currau, yes.” Once I realized I was in a pious position, I scrabbled back to my feet.
“Currau.” He repeated the name. “How do you know him? He’s in the hospital.”
