Probably.
Unless he didn’t want me. That thought hit like a punch to the gut.
What if he realized I was too damaged, too closed off, too fucked up from a childhood in group homes and a career built on violence? What if he saw all my scars and decided I wasn’t worth the effort?
I’d sustained a bad chemical burn during one of my first assignments. Some asshole had rigged a trap with corrosive accelerant. The doctors repaired my face, mostly. The skin on my left cheek would never be quite right, but it was passable. The scarring on my shoulder, upper arm, and part of my chest was worse. The tissue was uneven, discolored in places, shiny in others.
I’d never bothered with the follow-up regeneration procedures. They were painful, time-consuming, and honestly, I hadn’t cared. My body was a tool. Scars just proved the tool still worked.
But now I cared. Now I worried about what Baleck would think when he saw the mottled skin across my shoulder and chest. Would he be repulsed? Would he hide it well, try to be kind about it, but pull away?
The thought of him seeing me naked made my stomach clench with anxiety.
The thought of seeing him naked made my pulse quicken for entirely different reasons.
I let out a shaky breath. This was new territory. I’d had a boyfriend once, but it hadn’t lasted long and I’d never felt like this. Like my entire nervous system was rewiring itself around another person.
A sound outside the room made me freeze. Footsteps, but lighter than Vax or his guards. More careful.
I listened hard, wishing I had an enhanced ear to match my enhanced eye. My cybernetic eye could zoom and switch to night mode, but my hearing was depressingly human. Still, I strained to catch every tiny noise.
Fabric brushing against stone. The softest scrape of a boot. Someone was moving through the ruins with practiced stealth.
Baleck.
My heart hammered so hard I worried he’d hear it.
The door opened slowly, just a crack at first. Then Baleck slipped inside, and the entire world shifted.
I’d been holding myself together with discipline and training and sheer stubborn will. But seeing him there, silhouetted in the doorway with hiszavatin hand and his skin rippling with cautious amber tones, something cracked wide open inside me.
It wasn’t just relief. It was bigger than that. Like a door I’d kept locked my entire life suddenly swung open and flooded me with light. With possibility. With the terrifying, exhilarating realization that I wasn’t alone anymore. That I didn’t have to be.
For the first time, I was the one being saved. And I wasn’t even mad about it.
Baleck seemed to have no idea about the seismic shift happening in my chest. He crossed to me quickly, dropping to his knees beside me. His fingers worked at the knots with focused efficiency.
“Are you hurt?” he whispered, his voice low and urgent.
I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak yet.
He got the first knot free and moved to the second. His skin shifted to warmer golds and oranges in the dim light. Relief. Joy. I could read him so easily now.
My hands came free. Circulation rushed back painfully, but I ignored it. Instead, I grabbed his face between my palms and kissed him.
He froze. For one awful second, I thought I’d read this wrong. That something had changed since the last time he’d kissed me in the valley to now and I’d just made a big mistake.
Then his arms came around me and he was kissing me back with a passion that stole my breath. One hand cupped the back of my head, the other pressed against my lower back, pulling me closer. He tasted like determination and something sweet I couldn’t name. His lips were soft but insistent, and when his tongue swept against mine, I made a sound I’d never made before.
My fingers threaded through his shaggy hair. His skin was warm under my touch, colors rippling in waves I could feel as much as see. Every place we touched felt electric, alive. This wasn’t just attraction. This was recognition. Like my body knew his and had been waiting for this moment.
He pulled back, breathing hard. His eyes were molten amber and his skin glowed with vivid golds. “We can continue this later.”
“Promise?” The word came out rougher than I intended.
“Absolutely.” He helped me to my feet, keeping one hand on my elbow to steady me. “Can you walk?”
“I can run.” My legs were stiff from sitting but functional.
