In a welcome streakof good fortune, the herbs and seeds from Dinah contain almost everything I need to brew my little gift for Zara. And after surreptitiously plucking a handful of bitter nightshade leaves from outside the battle yard, I have everything I need. With the ingredients gathered, I steal into an empty dorm room and set up the little stove I brought from home.
I add the nightshade leaves whole, along with a handful of the chopped stems and a variety of crushed seeds from Dinah’s collection. My hands move as if by instinct, and as the contrast of aromas eddies in the air, I realise how much I’ve missed doing this. Not poisoning people, that is, but brewing.
This time in the High Hold is the longest I’ve ever gone without creating some sort of concoction, and a frisson of guilt stirs within me as I recall the promise I made to my mother that I would always take the daily tonic the way she taught – a habit I’ve let go of entirely since arriving here. Still, the food is so rich and varied that I’m undoubtedly getting everything my body needs. In fact, I’m sure I am. I certainly can’t recall feeling stronger. It’s almost odd not to have that gnawing ache in the pit of my stomach, just on the edge of starvation. My guilt intensifies at the knowledge that I have become so complacent about it, when so many are still going without. Hopefully, Leilah will get hold of Ruben, and I can start helping others a little.
Before long, Zara’s potion is simmering away. It needs a few days to infuse properly, but a grim smile comes to my lips at the thought of finally getting my revenge. No one deserves a severe case of the shits more than Zara.
And who knows, once she’s emptied her insides, maybe she’ll be a nicer person. I laugh at the thought. There’s no chance.
Ensuring the stove’s heat is set as low as it can be and it’s not in a position where anything could accidentally catch fire, I shut the door and head back to the dorm room I share with the islanders for some much-needed rest. Vengeance really takes it out of you.
It’s another day before I’m ready to face the battle yard, and when I do it’s the coldest morning I’ve experienced since returning from the healers. Apparently, there were two days of snow while I was away, and vestiges of it remain on the ground.
I head outside dressed in a long-sleeved top. Though I considered taking my furs down too, I quickly decided against it, knowing as I do how training with Zelle works. Within five minutes, I’ll be sweating profusely.
By the time I arrive in the yard, it’s later than normal and there’s no sign of Zelle. Instead, it’s Holden at the helm today, standing with his arms folded across his chest as he waits for us to gather around him. My stomach drops.
‘As everyone’s magic is fully replenished from the trials, everyone who has magic, that is’—he looks directly at me with a sneer—‘I thought it would be the perfect day for FOF of the team variety.’ If I’d thought surviving the first trial would earn me his respect, I’d be sorely disappointed. Thankfully, I don’t need, or even want, the respect of a man like him.
‘FOF?’ I ask, glancing at Jonas.
‘Force on Force,’ he explains. ‘Group style, by the sound of things.’ He turns to look at me directly. ‘I know there’s no point asking this, but as there’s magic involved?—’
‘Stay out of the way?’ I finish bitterly for him. ‘I know your position by now, Jonas.’ Still, this isn’t a trial. This is a game of Holden’s creation. Quite possibly purely to torture me. If I have to accept my friends’ help to survive, then I’m okay with that. That’s what good friends are for, right? Chats, hugs, and helping you survive megalomaniacs.
‘Now, I thought it would be fun to let you pick the teams,’ Holden continues, smirking viciously. ‘Although it’s always good to have clear team captains, don’t you think? Duarte, why don’t we start with you as one team captain?’ His eyes go to Zara, who grins maliciously as they exchange a knowing look. Whatever is coming, they’ve planned this together. His gaze sweeps back across the courtyard. ‘And let’s have … oh, let’s have Kultavaris as our other captain. Yes, that should make this interesting.’
‘What the fuck?’ Jonas quietly fumes beside me. ‘Five days. You spent five days at the healers because of her, and now he’s deliberately pitting you against her. I’m starting to think you’re right about Holden having somethingagainst you.’
Startingto? I’m not sure what more evidence he needs, but hey, it’s progress.
‘He’s one of Korvane Knavin’s men. What do you expect?’ Benny mutters beside me. A flash of something flares behind Benny’s eyes, only to be snuffed out in an instant, sending a strange shudder of unease down my spine.
‘Right, you’ve got two minutes to sort out your teams. Go.’
Given who I’m up against, I expect people to flock to Zara’s side, and while a few do – obviously the Rowell lot, not to mention most of the surviving Rettlings from Galreck – the others are more hesitant. Obviously, I’ve got Benny and co., but Holden didn’t say anything about splitting the teams evenly. I’m sure he’d be more than okay with it being twenty against two, as long as I’m on the losing side.
It’s with a jolt of shock that I see Grenda and Baylis come over to join us, along with Kestria and Seiren, though not Odetta – the other surviving Rettling from Dorain. I don’t know why I’m still so surprised that Kestria and Seiren made it through the first trial. It’s not as though I’m any stronger than they are. Odetta, on the other hand, was no surprise. She has the type of glint in her eye that reminds me more than a little of Zara, like she’s in the Retterheld not only for the gifting, but also for the chance to cause pain.
The other two knights go over to Zara’s group. Clearly, winning rather than morality is key to their agenda today.
‘Yeva, Nessira …’ Jonas calls the remaining two Wrohelm Rettlings over, and thankfully they agree. The resulting groups are far more even than I expected. Twelve against thirteen. Though in terms of fighting, I’m not sure how much that helps us, especially because they’ve got Zara and Mattieu, who can both inflict serious damage. I know Jonas says Yeva’s incredibly powerful, but we need ash for her to wield. And if Seiren could envelop us in one of her illusions, that would definitely help, but so far, I’ve never seen her do it deliberately.
‘How do we beat them, Benny?’ I hiss to him. ‘What can we do?’
‘I don’t know …’ His voice has an unusual quake to it. ‘I’m not sure. Not until I know what their tactics are.’
‘They just want to kill Rose.’ Loch shrugs.
I turn to look at the other islander. I swear, every day his skin becomes more and more drained, his eyes more and more vacant.
‘That’s their only plan. They just want Rose dead.’
A weightsettles in my stomach and my pulse rises. He’s speaking so matter-of-factly, as if talking about what he ate for breakfast. Saying the quiet part out loud – that this isn’t a team battle; it’s an excuse for them to end me.
I’m trying to push the fear down, but it’s hard when my gut says I’m totally screwed.
‘Fantastic. So, rules.’ Holden flashes me a smirk, like he already knows he’s signed my death warrant. ‘You stay on your feet, or you’re out. That simple. You can be brought to your knees, your back … I should probably warn against purposely trying to send people to Mortidem, but accidents happen.’ His smirk grows into a grin.
