‘You can’t win the gifting if you’re dead, Rose.’
‘No, I can’t win if Etta doesn’t think I’m worthy. Which is what will happen if I’m not actively participating in the trials.’
‘I’m not saying don’t participate.’
‘That’s exactly what you’re saying!’ I bite back. ‘I did well today, Jonas. I survived when people with magic, people who have trained every day, didn’t. If anything, today should have shown you just how capable I am.’ Goddess knows, it’s shown me.
‘I know you’re capable. It’s just …’ He lets out a long sigh and shakes his head. He lifts my hand up to his lips and plants a kiss on my palm. ‘Look, how about we stop this bickering and go back to what we were doing in the carriage? You do remember what we did in the carriage, right?’ The shadow of a grin flickers on his lips. ‘From what I remember, it was a lot of fun.’
Was it a lot of fun? It definitely wasn’t a bad kiss, but it was chaste, and I was also distracted by wanting to know what was waiting for us outside. Not to mention I was irritated by his lecture, which was remarkably similar to this one he’s just given me.
In the silence, Jonas’s eyes remain on me, waiting for me to respond, to let him know I want to kiss him again. But before I can figure out if that’s even true, my mouth opens into a wide yawn that’s immediately followed by another.
‘Sorry, I think today definitely took it out of me. The sleep in the carriage wasn’t exactly restful.’
Jonas laughs as he pecks the back of my hand. ‘You want me to stay? We could curl up together?’
It’s the first time he’s actually offered to stay in my bed with me, which means it’s the first time I’ve had to properly think about if it’s actually what I want. Before today, I’m sure I would have said yes, but today’s been a lot. And if we’re going to start something, I don’t want it to be on a day like this, when we’ve been at each other’s throats half the time. Yet still I hesitate before I reply.
There’s no denying that having someone lying next to me with their arms wrapped around me would be nice, but I shouldn’t just want ‘someone,’ should I?
‘Maybe another time,’ I murmur eventually. ‘You need your rest as well, and these beds aren’t exactly big enough for two.’
He presses his lips together, clearly disappointed, before nodding his head. ‘Fair enough. See you down at the dining hall for dinner? Apparently, they’ve put on one hell of a feast.’
I nod as I watch him leave, then slip into the shower to wash off the blood and grime before tumbling into sleep.
It’spitch-black outside my window and the smell of snow is strongin the air as I drag myself out of bed a while later, slip on clean clothes, and head downstairs.
When I get to the table, Benny and Llinos are already deep in conversation while Loch stares at nothing. I’m surprisingly relieved that there’s no sign of Jonas, and the thought makes me grimace. It’s not a good sign.
‘Where is everyone?’ I ask, gesturing to the emptiness of the hall. ‘Am I early?’
‘No,’ Benny replies solemnly.
My jaw drops. ‘You mean this is it?’ I turn back around, unwilling to believe what they’re telling me. This can’t be all who made it, surely?
Llinos and Benny exchange a look.
‘There’s no one with the healers,’ Llin says quietly. ‘I was there just before. Maybe a couple are elsewhere, like Kyor. But the others …’
My throat thickens with a lump I can’t swallow. The knights’ numbers have been decimated, with only half a dozen remaining. The dire wolves of those who didn’t make it will be similarly doomed now, as the only thing that awaits a broken-bonded wolf is a slow death. The thought that the deaths haven’t ended with those just in the room chills me.
There’s only one other person with Seiren and Kestria at the Dorain table. The Galreck numbers are equally diminished, and when my gaze falls on the Rowell Rettlings, I can’t help but gasp.
‘Shim’s not here?’ There’s a crack in my voice. ‘Shim didn’t make it?’
Llinos shrugs. ‘Better people than him have died today.’
‘I know, but still—’ How has one trial taken out so many people? There are three more to go before we get to the Ofur, and at this rate, we’ll be lucky if even a handful make it that far.
I continue staring around the room, trying to pick out faces – or rather, missing faces – from the groups. Nessira’s father – Nathan, the fire wielder – isn’t here, and from the way her aunt Clade is comforting her, I’m guessing he’s among the dead.
Both Baylis and Grenda are still among the surviving knights, along with another four I don’t know by name yet.
‘Benny told me he took the High Priestess’s offer,’ Llinos says. ‘Thank the Gods. He also said that there were three others on the platform when the trial ended.’
‘Do you know if they all accepted the gift?’ I question, annoyed that I didn’t think to ask him earlier.
