She chews on her bottom lip. ‘I know I’m a member of the court, but there’s something else you must know.’ She repeats the chewing motion as she draws in a breath. ‘I … I’m pregnant.’
My jaw drops. I stagger back a little, falling into the chair behind me. ‘You’re what?’ I whisper, making no attempt to hide my shock.
She brushes my concern away with a wave of her hand. ‘You do not need to worry, I promise.’
‘You are pregnant, out of wedlock, without a …’ I stop as another thought careens in. ‘Whose baby is it?’
She grimaces. ‘It is Hew’s. I thought he loved me.’ She scoffs, a bitter look crossing her face before she pastes on a smile, as if what is coming next is positive. ‘When I told him of our baby, he admitted to already being betrothed to a duchess in Dorain.’
‘What?’ I can barely speak, barely think. Hew got my sister pregnant, with no intention of doing the honourablething? ‘The men of the Wrohelm court are snakes,’ I snarl. ‘Every single one of them.’ I press my thumbs against my temples as I rub my forehead. Kay is pregnant out of wedlock. She will be kicked out of the court again. As the thought enters my head, my brain catches up to the rest of her words. Dropping my hands I look her in the eye. ‘But if the baby is Hew’s, and he’s marrying someone else, then who areyoumarrying?’
Wordlessly, she entwines her fingers with mine. From the nervous soft smile that graces her lips, I already know I am going to hate what follows. ‘Honestly, I promise you, it is fine. I have sorted it.’
Sorted it? Relief storms in. She’s taken a potion, ended the burgeoning life before it can end hers. ‘Have you taken a tonic?’ I ask her, but when she looks blank, I continue, ‘If not, I can make one. I have not made one for a while, but I’m sure I?—’
‘No!’ She snatches her hand from mine. I see the horror in her eyes, the same as the night I killed Holden. Horror and judgement for my actions. ‘Death did not used to be your first instinct, Rose, and it certainly isn’t mine.’
‘I killed for you!’ I snap back.
‘I didn’t ask you to!’ Her own voice rises. ‘I would never have asked you to.’ Her breath seethes through gritted teeth as she clenches and unclenches her hands. ‘Rose …’ She says my name with forced composure. ‘This life growing inside me is my child. I’m not going to just dispose of it because the timing is inconvenient. I’m not so heartless as you.’
‘Pardon?’ I could not have been more shocked if she had punched me. Heartless? Is that how she sees me? After all I have done for her, hearing that word tripping from Kay’s tongue is crippling. ‘You have no idea what my heart has gone through,’ I snarl. Any ounce of patience I have is gone. ‘I’m done with this, Acacia,’ I snap. ‘If you are not taking the tonic nor are you marrying the father, then who exactly are you planning to marry to remedy this Godsawful mess?’
She presses her lips together. For the first time, I feel the slightest hint of nervousness radiating from her. ‘I am going to marry Artur.’
‘Artur?’ I frown, confused. There is only one person I know by that name, and I am certain she cannot mean him. Not ageing, portly Artur Lorathin. ‘Who?’ I ask again. Maybe there is another Artur at court I have not yet met.
Then she speaks, and in a single moment confirms all of my worst fears. She tips her chin up. ‘I am marrying Lord Artur Lorathin. Jonas’s father.’
Chapter 75
If I were not already sitting, my knees would have collapsed. How? How, after everything I did to give us a better life, have we ended up here?
When I finally find my voice, it is laden with desperation and disbelief.
‘Kay, you cannot be serious. He is … he’s old enough to be our father. Closer to grandfather’s age, even.’
She shrugs like his age is of no concern. ‘But he is wealthy. A life with him would be secure. The baby and I would both be secure.’
I shake my head vehemently. ‘No, Kay. I forbid it. There has to be another way.’
She folds her arms and glares, looking impossibly young. Nothing more than a teenager having a strop. My heart breaks anew. ‘I thought you would be proud of me for dealing with my own problems. But no, precious little Kay can’t possibly make decisions about her own life!’
I baulk. ‘That is not what I meant.’ I try to take her hand but she jerks away from me. ‘You’re so young, Kay. You don’t need to tie yourself to an old man. We can find another way.’
‘I don’t need you to find another way!’ she shouts.
I bristle, sitting back. ‘Please, Kay, you’re not thinking straight.’
‘Yes, yes, I am thinking straight. You just never listen. You always have to barrel in and save me, controlling everything. You think I’m incapable of doing anything for myself.’
‘That’s notwhat I think!’ I snap.
‘Yes, yes, it is. You lie to me. You hide things from me.’
‘Kay, I swear I only do the things I do to protect you.’
‘I’m an adult.’
