Yesterday, while I was in his arms, and even this morning when he said he wanted me to come, I could ignore how much I stand out in his circle, but the problem is that despite all the warmth I’ve felt from Gael and Rafe, my only real link here is Guillermo and Nina. And even then, it’s a very fragile, recent connection.
I can’t decipher his contradictory actions, and I feel like this link is getting more and more fragile, making me insecure.
I shift uncomfortably in my chair and hope I haven’t drawn attention, but he immediately touches my arm.
“What’s wrong?”
I lift my head and, after checking that none of his family members are paying attention to us, I say, “I need to go.”
“Why now?”
“I’m sorry, I just need to go back to the hotel.”
I think deep down I hoped he would try to convince me otherwise, but instead, he just replies, “Okay.”
“Why don’t you want to come back to my place?”
He’s standing in front of the hotel. Nina fell asleep in her car seat in the back, and we’ve been silent the whole way.
When I said goodbye to his family, strangely, Mrs. Isabel invited me to come back and meet her husband next time. I don’t understand anything. I spent the previous few hours thinking she didn’t want anything to do with me.
During the goodbyes, Rafe showed me, without a doubt, that he’s the most loving person among the Caldwell-Oviedos—and perhaps the most sensitive too. Gael made a joke, Joaquín kissed me again—and by then I was kind of prepared, so I didn’t die of shock—but Rafe must have noticed something was wrong because he pulled me into a hug.
“Can I ask for your phone number? I’d like to continue that conversation about dreams and plans,” he said.
I smiled awkwardly and typed it into the phone he handed me, aware that Guillermo was watching me.
“Olívia.” He calls me back to the present, but I already have my hand on the doorknob.
“You’ve already answered your own question, Guillermo. That’s your home, not mine. Goodnight.”
Mr. Guillermo:Have dinner with me tomorrow. We need to talk.
I almost smile when I realize that I haven’t changed the way I referred to him initially in my phone’s contact list. Perhaps it was my subconscious warning me that what was between us wouldn’t last.
Me:Thank you, but no. There are too many changes happening in my life, and I need to think.
I switch off the phone afterwards.
Away from him, I’m finally getting my head straight. I need to snap out of it. This isn’t a fairy tale. It’s my life, and there’s no chance of our story ending well.
When things between us started to go to another level, I wasn’t expecting a commitment but rather to spend some time with a guy who makes my body feel like it’s in the clouds. The problem is that something inside me is changing, and he’s not helping with his mixed messages, pulling me close, being possessive, only to emotionally distance himself like he didtoday at his parents’ house. At this rate, I’d rather end it all at once before being asked to leave his life.
He said we need to talk, and I can imagine what it might be about. I joked that day about the CEO warning his romantic partner in books that he doesn’t want a serious involvement, but that’s probably what he intends to talk to me about.
Though I knew any relationship we had would be temporary, watching it be laid out like a menu where you can choose which items you should or shouldn’t try doesn’t sit well with me.
Toro Restaurant—Boston
“Olívia, it’s the third time I’ve asked the same thing. Can you come back to Planet Earth?”
I had completely forgotten about the blind date, and it wasn’t until I went to work this morning that the image of the handsome blond, who happens to be Melissa’s boyfriend’s cousin, came back to my memory.
So now we’re at a bar waiting for the guys, although the last thing I wanted was to come. It feels like ages since we arranged this meeting, and any enthusiasm I had at the time has dissipated.
Moreover, Melissa is relentlessly questioning me about my fall at the office and what happened right after. Of course, I didn’t say anything. Not about the absence of the wet floor sign, nor about going to Guillermo’s house when I left the hospital. I don’t want speculation about us.
I was very tempted to make up an excuse when she reminded me about the date this morning, but I decided that hiding in my room would be worse.
