Amen, brother.
Chapter Fourteen
Self-reflection.
Cleo saw both sides. It was important to dig deep into oneself. It could be eye-opening and therapeutic. But sometimes, it was really hard to digthatdeep. Facing demons and a past she wanted to forget stirred up emotions she wasn’t sure she wanted to face.But sometimes, it’s forced upon us.
That was the current state of Cleo’s world. Her self-reflection wasn’t without revelations. Cleo had been too wrapped up in her shame to see the clear picture or acknowledge the facts. It took a day. But it happened. While drudging up the past had been painful, it made way for a new perspective. Something Cleo had never considered or done.
Sometimes you have to be your own savior. There was only one person she could unequivocally trust.Herself.
Cleo could’ve spent days, weeks, or months wallowing in her own self-pity. But where would that get her? Nowhere good, and she knew it.I choose how this plays out.She wasn’t fully committed to that stance, but she was prepared to fake it until it became her new reality. Things had changed, and soshehad to change.
Ace’s words played over in her head.Fix this.There were a few ways she’d come up with. None of them worked in her favor. The outcomes were all the same, and she and Wraith wouldn’tend up together. The hardest part was getting a small sliver of something beautiful and amazing, just to have it ripped away.
Isn’t that how it goes?For Cleo, the answer was yes. Her brother was a prime example. When Knox brought her back to Killcreek, she’d thought it was something solid, a relationship that would last a lifetime. They’d build their bond, have memories and finally she’d have a real family. And in a matter of years, it was all gone.
Maybe people like me don’t get happily ever afters.
Cleo eyed herself in the mirror. She’d showered, done her hair and makeup, and even put effort into her outfit. It was the first time in days she’d smiled.Be this girl.Not the one who hung her head low, drowning in shame. She’d grown tired of hiding. It was exhausting and isolating. She couldn’t change her past. But shecouldchange how she looked at it.
She made her way downstairs. There were a few members milling around the room. From the corner of her eye, she caught Wraith at the table with Cross and Ace. She ignored them, refusing to make eye contact. But she felt his stare as if it was burning her skin.
Cleo wasn’t ready to face him. She might never be.I don’t want to see that look.Cleo walked toward the kitchen, passing Cypher.
“I’m heading to Grizz’s,” he said, and she spun around. It was the perfect getaway. And it wasn’t so off base. Cleo didn’t have a close relationship with the man old enough to be her grandfather. But she’d shared a few conversations, and there was a mutual likeness and appreciation.And it gets me out of this goddamn clubhouse.
“Hey, Cypher?”
He glanced over his shoulder and lifted his chin.
“Can I come with you?”
Cypher slowly turned, eyeing her and then looking over at Ace. He was waiting on approval, and Cleo wasn’t sure the president would give it. She glanced over at Ace, who was staring back at her. Wraith was sitting beside him but she stayed focused on the president.
Please, Ace. I need this.
She wasn’t sure if he’d read her mind or found his own compassion. But Ace gave a curt nod, granting permission.
“I’ll grab my bag.”
Cypher knitted his brows. “I’m taking my bike.”
In all her time at Killcreek, she’d only been on the back of three members’ bikes. Knox’s mostly, occasionally Ghost’s, and after her brother’s death, always Wraith’s. She ignored the awkward tension in the room and nodded.
“Great! I’ll grab my helmet.” She started toward the hallway but didn’t get far.
“Cleo.” Her muscles tightened and she slowly turned to face Ace. “Wraith will take you over.”
It wasn’t an offer. It was an order. Something she never defied. Until now.
Cleo forced a smile, but refused to look at Wraith.Again,I don’t want to see that look.
“No, thanks. I’ll go with Cypher.” She rushed out of the room and ran up the stairs.
She suspected Cypher wouldn’t be waiting when she came back down. Surprisingly, he was standing by the door.
It was only a short ride to Grizz’s house and neither of them spoke a word. Cleo recognized she was putting Cypher in an uncomfortable position. But if it bothered him, he showed no signs.
