She could not talk to Callum. If she told him about Edward, no doubt his response would be to suggest running him through with a sword.
She found herself crying again and this time there didn’t seem to be any reason.
“Something ails you,” Callum said. “What is it?”
“I’m fine,” she replied.
“Och, you’re not fine.” He brought the horse to a halt and jumped down, holding out a hand to her. “We will rest here a wee while and you’ll tell me what is troubling you.”
She climbed down and fell into his arms, her tears turning into uncontrollable wretched sobs.
He held her against him and that just made it worse. He hadn’t looked angry. He wasn’t shouting at her for getting upset. He was just holding her and saying nothing at all.
“Why aren’t you getting angry with me?” she managed to ask, the words sounding ragged and interrupted by hitching breaths.
“Angry? For what?”
“For getting upset.”
“Why would I get angry for that?”
She couldn’t answer. She was crying again. It felt as if her tears would never stop.
When she was finally able to talk again she found herself telling him everything. Whether it was because the wood felt so safe, or because they were alone, or perhaps because she knew he could tell no one in her time about it, she shared everything. She told him about Edward, about how they met, about how he changed, how his irritation became anger and how his anger became violence.
More memories came back as she talked. He had followed her to the castle. She had been there at MacCleod castle and he had talked to her there. Had he attacked her? That was still a blank but she knew one thing for sure. When she got back home, she needed to deal with him.
Finally she was done. She sat feeling drained on a soft floor of pine needles, her legs crossed as she leaned back against a tree trunk, utterly exhausted.
Callum sat opposite her in silence. “Say something,” she said at last. “Say anything. Tell me I’m an idiot for falling for him. Tell me I’m even more of an idiot for liking you. Go on, I know. I deserve to hear it.”
“You’re no fool,” he replied quietly, his brow furrowed. “The fool was the man that saw a beauty such as a rose on a spring day and decided to stamp it into the dirt beneath. The fool was the man who ever hurt you for if I see him myself I shall have a few words to say to him and they will not be pleasant ones.”
“I’m sorry, you didn’t need to hear all that. You don’t even know me and here I am blurting it all out. I feel like such an idiot.”
“We should get moving if we are to reach the inn before nightfall.”
“Yes,” she said, getting to her feet. “Of course. The inn. Let’s get moving.”
He helped her onto the horse and she winced at his touch. She shouldn’t have shared all that. He thought the worse of her and she couldn’t blame him. He’d no doubt be glad to get rid of her. She couldn’t exactly have made herself seem less appealing, sobbing into his chest and telling him all her woes.
Way to go, she told herself. Way to make yourself seem utterly irresistible. He’ll definitely want you now.
She sat perfectly still as they rode toward the far end of the wood, following the winding path as the light began to fade. Callum said nothing. He didn’t need to. Kerry knew exactly what he was thinking. He was thinking how glad he would be to finally get rid of her. She didn’t blame him.
If only she could stop wanting him, everything else would be so much easier. But even with her toes curling in cringing embarrassment due to her ridiculous oversharing, she still wanted him and the thought of leaving him was still gnawing away at her.
It was not an easy ride to the inn and by the time they got there, her head was pounding. She looked at the flickering light in the distance and felt an overwhelming sense of relief. The darkness falling on the land around her had made her fear of another ambush overtake all other thoughts.
“The light,” Callum said, pointing past her. “There we rest.”
She did not reply. She was too busy staring at the bushes either side of them, every single one looking perfect for an outlaw to hide behind and leap out, sword drawn.
She felt as if she held her breath the rest of the way until at last the inn loomed up at them out of the darkness, a single light in an immensity of night that had swallowed the entire landscape.
“Let’s go inside,” Callum said, riding through an archway into a courtyard. “Find a stable boy and get something to eat.”
“I’d rather have chicken,” Kerry replied, pleased to see him smile in response.
He held open the door to the inn and from inside a pleasant heat drifted out. She took a final look at the dark sky before stepping inside into an entirely new world.
