“Okay, cool. Thanks.” I feel Drew tug me backwards—taking us to a pair of chairs by Felix and Kayla who have already done theseintroductions pre our arrival.
About ten minutes later Alex comes in—jittery and nervous as ever—but he melts into the group just fine.
“Hey.” He breathes, sitting next to me. “That guy is fuckinghuge.” He’s pointing at Josh.
“Yeah, I’ll be calling him The Barbarian from now on.” Alex snickers—leaning around me to greet Felix and introduce himself to Kayla and Drew now that he spoke to Aaron’s friends.
Everyone is mingling—getting to know each other. I find that I like Jenna the most out of anyone, which sucks because Cammie isn’t letting her go literally anywhere without her if she can help it. She’s like a crazier Felix. Kade is very soft and shy for someone his size, and Darian has a way of soothing nerves when he talks to you.
The hangout session is a success—and all the while I feel Aaron staring right into me. Right onto my chest and that button. My skin is on fire the entire time. I feel like if I look at him even once I’ll show some kind of emotion or action that reveals how much this is affecting me.God, I’m the worst boyfriend ever.
I just wanted him to see the necklace. Lie. I wanted it to get to him. I wanted to get under his skin and watch him squirm. Only now I can’t even fucking watch—and he’s makingmesquirm.
I’ve known Aaron for ten years, and some part of me feels I can read what he’s thinking—what his eyes are drilling into me so intensely. So when I finally look—when I gather my courage and set my gaze on him—my entire mouth goes dry. He’s already looking. And what do his eyes say?
Do you understand what wearing that necklace means? Do you understand what showing it to me created? Like a kitten with a collar, you are mine, Button.
I shiver and swallow the desire.
Chapter Nineteen
October 2019
Aaron
It’s October so everyone’s in a panic about Halloween costumes. In college this is a huge deal foreveryonefor some reason. Benjamin included, apparently—as he barged his way into my apartment mid-tantrum and threw himself onto my bed. Now I’m staring at him as he screams into my pillow.
Turning to my left I look at Felix—the unfortunate addition to this show since he was already here for pizza and movies—and say, “How do we fix him?”
“When it comes to clothes, we can’t.” He shakes his head, voice and expression grim. Benjamin groans, sitting up to face us. His face is red and his hair is sticking up as he glares at us. I try to ignore how similar this Benjamin looks to Benjamin when I’m fucking my fingers into him, and listen to his little monologue.
“You don’t get it. I had so many good ideas and he won’t do any of them. He said it’s veryhigh school. Listen, gotta adore Drew, but that sounds pretentious as hell.” He takes a deep breath. “Okay, I take that back. That was mean and I shouldn’t talk like that.”
Watching him fight his own brain when it comes to Drew is kind of entertaining. I wonder what it is that’s keeping him attached to him.
“So, screw him. Do a solo act.” I shrug my shoulders, arms crossed as I stare down at him. He groans again, flopping backward onto his back—pillow in hand.
“Yeah, I tried. But every one I came up with, Drew made anhmmsound to—which means no, by the way. Ugh.” I look at Felix, see his sympathetic eyes, and return to watching Benjamin. I’m starting to think Felix doesn’t like Drew. I’m starting to think Felix sees a lot more than he shows us.
“What were the ideas?” He asks. Benjamin throws an arm over his face.
“Well, at first I wanted to be Mikaela fromSeraph of the End. You know, pre-vamp. Cute little blonde, impulsive, ends up being super hot—and his type is tall, dark-haired guys. We’re the same person, basically.” Felix chokes on a laugh, eyeing me out of the corner of his eye.
“What was wrong with it?” I ask, clearing my throat and ignoring that last comment.
“The costume is a short-sleeved hoodie, a pair of shorts, and there’s those black ribbons. One on both ankles and one on his neck. They’re not ribbons in the show obviously, but you know.”
“So?” Benjamin sighs.
“I don’t exactly know. It might be the collar—people seeing me in it. Or it could be that when we were watching the show one day I said I’d let Guren fuck me.” Felix busts out laughing. “Yeah, I shouldn’t have said that. I mean, he’sanimated? Whatever.”
Felix nudges my shoulder with his. “Guren is a tall, dark-haired guy by the way.” I can feel my face flushing.
Benjamin’s still lying back and groaning. I don’t get it. Was Drew always like this? Benjamin wouldn’t have dated him if he was.
“The other one was an angel. It was so common I thought no way I can go wrong with this—but,” He sits up, looking between us with an expression that reads,listen to this shit. “It wasvery provocative. And since we’re going out with everyone he doesn’t think it’s very respectful of myself.”
“Ah,” Felix says. “Kayla’s going as a sexy kitty. I get to look at her ass all night.” He’s grinning like a man who won an unattainable prize, and Benjamin jumps up—pointing right at him.
