“Well, since I’m getting your juice, you should have to leave me an offering. It’s only fair.”
“Point me in the direction of the shrine—I’m on it.” Benjamin laughs, giving a thumbs-up. Now that my eyes have fully adjusted, I head to the kitchen. Only, standing in the doorway of the den—blocking my path—is Drew. I pause, standing in front of the couch where Benjamin is sitting, and sigh, rubbing my forehead.
“I cannot deal with this right now—my head iskillingme.”“Here, here.” Amber agrees.
“Oh, morning Drew.” Felix greets, moving to sit up next to Kayla.
Benjamin slowly pulls the rag off of his face. As his eyes adjust—since I’m standing directly in front of him—he looks at me first. Wide, anxious eyes. I’m assuming he hasn’t called Drew back yet. Awkward.
“Jesus fucking Christ.” I hear Drew mutter under his breath.
“Still want that OJ?” Benjamin glares at me.
“Well!” Mom walks in the den, effectively cutting off that trainwreck of a confrontation, and Drew goes to stand by the TV across the room from us. “Now that we’re all finally here, we have news.” Dad comes to stand behind her, smiling widely.
“Oh, I love news. You going onAmerica’s Next Top Model, Cutie?” Amber asks Benjamin, shooting him a flirty smile. He grins back at her, rolling his eyes as his little dimples come out to play.
“Actually, these four have news.” Mom says, pointing to the new graduates.
“We wanted to wait till we all had one. Now, we all do. So we’re opening them today—together.” Still heavily confused, I stare at my baby brother, waiting for whatever grand surprise they’re building up to. What could I enjoy that involves Drew?
Felix and Kayla pull out envelopes with the University of Arizona logo on them and my heart drops. My eyes snap to Drew’s hands—and sure enough, fucker is holding one.That means…
I spin on my heel, aggravating my headache and completely ignoring the black spots I momentarily see. Benjamin is holding his envelope as well. He’s smiling up at me like he’s proud that he was able to actually keep this from me until now.
Looking between Felix and Benjamin, I say, “This is the best fucking day of my life.” Everyone laughs. Well—almost everyone.
“Me first.” Felix rips the envelope open—no intention of preserving the paper. He reads a few lines before punching the airBreakfast Clubstyle. Then, “They’re not ready for two Archer boys.” He says, pulling me into a hug. Kayla decides to do hers, and when she reads it, she’s accepted as well. Everything’s moving so fast.
“Aaron got his wish—he won’t have to babysit next year.” Felix rolls his eyes, and I chuckle, mock bowing to Kayla to show my respect. She turns to Drew. “Your turn, Drewy.”
Drew sighs, opening the seal and pulling out the letter. After a long, painful moment he looks directly at me and says,
“You won’t be able to get rid of me that easily—I’m afraid you’re stuck with me.” Felix yells and fist-bumps him, completely missing the tension in the room. Fucking asshole. Piece of shit. Why is he here again? Oh, right. I turn around and look down at Benjamin. He’s staring at his letter, hands shaking.
“Button?” Hazel eyes find mine. He’s panicking—doesn’t really look like an excited applicant. This scene looks familiar.
“This is my ticket out of here. If I fail, I can’t go with Felix. I’ll be in Lancaster alone. This one letter determines my entire future—my happiness. If I failed, I willnever—”
“Benjamin,” I say, and as my heart sings so sweetly to him—the same way he did for me—I ask, “Would you like me to open it?” After a moment, he smiles and hands me the envelope.
Opening the letter for him is just as terrifying as I imagine opening my own would have been. No wonder he had been shaking. I don’t play with him the way he did me. As soon as I see the accepted message, I look down at him and say,
“We’re going to fuck up so much shit for the next three years.” A big, radiant sun smile spreads across his face as the room cheers. They all did it. They’re all coming to stay with me and Amber.
A bit later—as I watch Drew pull Benjamin out of the room—I feel a bit of hesitance, wondering if rather than the miracle we feel it is, this will end up with us worse off than we were before.
Chapter Eighteen
August 2019
Benjamin
The end of August is sweltering; I can feel the back of my shirt sticking to my skin. I tied it up this morning to get some relief from the heat, but instead it’s just showing my very sweaty stomach. Trails of said sweat are running down my stomach and back, soaking into the waistband of my briefs where they stick out from the top of my board shorts. I can feel it trailing my thighs too—probably collecting in my fucking socks. My shorts only go down my thighs far enough to cover half of the scar Aaron gave me, and some twisted part of me has been getting off on it all day.
Felix and I are about done moving everything into our dorm. Tina and Greg left about ten minutes ago, and surprisingly she cried more than Felix this time. Aaron hasn’t come by yet—he’s been in charge of some club orientation activity for his major.
The dorm isn’t very big, but we have our own beds for the first time in—well—ever. The bathroom isn’t too bad if not kind of cramped, and if I’m honest I’m definitely not going to be able to fit all my clothes in that wardrobe. As soon as Tina and Greg started giving me an allowance for chores around the house, I turned into a fashion diva. I’ve expanded too much, apparently.
