“You don’t understand me, Aaron.” I think Benjamin is genuinely panicking. “I’ve been alive for 22 years and until recently I’ve never… I’ve never been allowed this kind of happiness. Not like this. Not so much at once. So, either the world is going to end or I died and the universe is making up for all its wrongdoings by letting me play out my fantasies.”
I reach out—pull him to me—hold his face.
“Hey—listen to me. You’re not dead and the world’s not ending. Want to know what I think?” Benjamin nods against my hands. “I think all the bad cards finally ran out. You were dealt so many horrors so young, and they never seemed to stop. Now, I think they’ve simply run out. Baby—all you have left is happiness.”
He buries his face into my neck, sniffling and wrapping his arms around my waist. I let him calm—I wait until he’s not trembling.
Eventually, he speaks.
“So… we live here? Together? As fiancés?”
“Ah—fuck that sounds so sexy. Let’s fuck on the bedroom floor.” Benjamin laughs—pulling back to look at me.
“You’re such a pervert.” I wrap an arm around his waist, pull him back againstme.
“I’m just in love with you.” He blushes, staring back at me with those fucking eyes.
“Are you? Tell me how in love you are. Let me hear you say it.” He’s looking up at me so enticingly—so seductive.
“I’m so in love with you—you’re all I think about all day. Any time I see your clothes lying around all I think about is stripping them off of you. When someone mentions you, it pisses me off because onlyIshould have your name in my mouth.” Benjamin moans—pushing his hips into mine. “I’m so fucking in love with you that the first thing I did when I graduated was start looking for our home. So in love for so long that five years ago at that fucking party—I saw you going to fuck that girl and I felt such unbearable, untamable rage. I didn’t care if it meant you beating the shit out of me—I wasn’t letting it happen.”
“Aaron—fuck. Let’s go home.” He’s pulling on my hand—eyes glassy and shorts more tented the harder he gets.
“Wearehome.” He whines.
“I know—but take me to the apartment and rail me on our bed while you tell me how much you love me. You can fuck me here when there’s no risk of ruining the carpets.” This makes me laugh. Of course that’s what he’s thinking of. I grab him, tossing him over my shoulder and landing a hard smack onto his ass. “Aaron.”
“Come on, baby—I have a million more love confessions to whisper to you while you scream.
Chapter Forty Five
October 2023
Aaron
Toward the end of the week we have all of our things moved into our new house. Our friends help in rotation, and we pay them generously in pizza and praise. Our stuff fills up a good portion of the house, but Benjamin takes inventory of things we need that we didn’t have before. Living in a house is a lot more work—apparently.
I’m lying in our living room watching some drama when Benjamin gets home. I hear the garage open and just like a puppy I pop up to sit—turning my head to stare at the door that leads to the garage. Benjamin walks in—looking up to see me and startling.
“Jesus! Can I help you?”
“You sure can.” I grin at him, watching as he sets down the cleaning supplies and laundry soap he went out to buy for our first night here.
“You’re basically wagging your tail over there.” He giggles, coming to stand behind the couch, running a hand through my hair.
“Want me to bark for you?” He hums—considering my offer.
“I thought cats were afraid of dogs?” My grin widens—slowly turning into one that probably makes me look like I’m hunting him down for dinner. I see the heat ignite in his eyes—hear his breath quicken.
“Exactly.” I sit up on my knees, face to face with him. “Are you scared, baby?” He swallows.
“No.” I tsk.
“Wrong answer. You better run.” He’s off—sprinting to our bedroom, most likely to lock me out. I catch up to him first, keeping the door open with sheer force as he pushes with all hismight. “Give it up little kitten—I’m already inside.” Sure enough, I’ve slipped into the room.
Benjamin backs away from me until his knees hit our bed and when I walk toward him, he climbs up and backs away on top of that too. His back hits the wall as my knees hit the edge of the bed.
“What are you going to do to me?” He asks and I damn near shudder. I fucking love that line almost as much as he loves saying it.
