“Glurp isn’t a word.”
“It isnow.”
“I think the word you’re looking for is ‘slurp.’”
“No, actually.The word that applies to this moment is ‘assclown.’ Because that’s what you’re acting like right now.A total glurping assclown.”
Only then do I realize that Bryttni and Kirk are silent.I dare take a peek at my date.He looks like he’d rather be under the wheels of a city bus than here.
Bryttni scowls at Declan, then me, like she’s trying to figure out what our deal is.Good luck with that.
“I hear they have fabulous venison, too,” Kirk says in a gallant attempt to change the subject.
“Summer bagged two bucks last season,” Declan announces with pride.“I enjoyed venison steak every night for two weeks.Tell everyone how you butchered those stags, Summer.”
“What do you meanhow?The normal way.Hang ’em upside down and let the blood drain out of their necks before I skin ’em.”
Kirk looks pale.Bryttni makes an upchuck sound in the back of her throat.
“Help me powder my nose, Declan.”I throw my napkin on the table.
“Why the fuck would I want to do that?”
I stand and grab his suit jacket, tugging him to his feet.Then I pinch his upper arm.“Hurry up.”
He follows me to the alcove near the bathrooms.We round the corner to escape the prying eyes of the other diners.Every one of them, including the toddler in the corner screaming and throwing mashed potatoes, looks like they’re having a better time than I am.
Declan turns to face me, and I shove my hand against his chest, pushing his back to the wall.“Stop making me out like I’m some sort of ignorant country hick.”
“You’re doing a bang-up job of that all on your own.”
I grind the sole of my fancy shoe onto his instep.He starts to howl in pain, but I clamp my hand over his mouth.“You know damned well that you’re trying to make me look stupid in front of Kirk.He’s an asset manager.He has no interest in skinning deer.”
“Mmm!Mmm-mmm!”
I drop my hand so he can speak.
“You have no clue what the man’s interested in, Summer, because you don’t know the first thing about him.”
“Don’t you dare screw this up for me.Remember, I know where you live, and I own three castration knives.”
He nods.“Yeah.I know.All three were gifts from me, remember?Two for Christmas last year.One for your birthday this year.”
“What man decides to give a woman castration knives as gifts?”My voice has increased in volume.
“Thisman!”Declan’s voice is even louder than mine.“Because I asked you what you wanted and your answer was, and I quote, ‘I want castration knives’!”
An elderly gentleman chooses that moment to head to the men’s room.He scurries past us like we’re nutters.
I guess we are.
I remove my shoe from Declan’s foot and take a step back from him.
“What was I supposed to ask for?I work for your family.That’s why I suggested something work-related, which is absolutely appropriate.Was I supposed to ask you for a trip to Maui?A VIP dinner and hotel suite?Unlimited use of your American Express card?”
His eyes flash.He swallows hard.It takes him a moment to regain his focus.
“Let’s call a truce,” he says.
