‘To experience more in life. I’m nearly thirty and on my own in this world.’
‘No parents?’
‘A mother, but she’s never championed me. The only time I was flavour of the month was when I found a man who she thought was successful and could show off to her friends. The funny thing was, he didn’t like her one bit. When I found out about his infidelity, that was the time I needed someone the most. I was so alone, and even though she was living across the Channel, I reached out to her, hoping she would be there for me. Maybe she’d invite me to France, maybe build some bridges.’ Verity’s voice faltered. ‘But no. I should have known better. She was cold towards me, said it must have been my fault, claiming he would never do that and I’d never be anything without him. That was the last time we spoke. I didn’t make the decision lightly to cut her out of my life – it was a build-up of things over the years’
‘That must have been difficult. I can’t imagine a mother not putting their own child first.’
‘I’ve learned from all this – it’s okay to cut off toxic family members. She was never good for my mental health but I let her affect me for years because she was my mother. She’d rather go to her grave than take responsibility for how she treated me, but I’m happy to say I’ve largely made peace with it. I’m certainly getting over all the heartbreak of Richard’s infidelity.’
‘And your father?’
‘My mother always kept his identity hidden. For what reason, I’m really not sure.’
They carried on walking down a steep part of the cliff. ‘You must have had some good influences in your life, I hope?’ said Pete.
‘Yes, my granny and granddad. They took over my upbringing from an early age. We were so close. My granny is the reason I became a veterinary assistant, as she was obsessed with animals. But going back to your question, my dream is to be happy and live my life the best I can. I’d like children one day.’
‘From what I’ve seen of you so far, I think you’ll make a wonderful mother.’
‘Thank you, that’s a lovely thing to say.’ Verity took a sip of her water and pointed towards the bay. ‘What are they doing over there?’
‘It’ll soon be fifty years since we lost Joe and they’re setting up for his remembrance service.’ Pete took off his hat for a moment and clutched it in his hand.
‘You miss him, don’t you?’
‘Every day I wish I could talk to him one last time,’ he admitted.
‘You’re going to the remembrance service, aren’t you?’ Verity could see by the sadness in his eyes how much he was still hurting. Maybe she could talk to Sam again and encourage him to chat to Pete before the service. It was possible that if they spoke to each other and let each other know exactly how they were feeling, they could move on and help each other through the undoubtedly emotional service.
‘Even though I know I probably won’t be welcomed by certain members of Joe’s family, I’ll stand at the back and pay my respects.’
‘Everyone has the right to pay respects to someone they loved dearly.’
Pete nodded and pointed to the burrow in the ground. ‘This is your first burrow. Let’s start counting those puffins.’
Verity looked at the hole in the ground. ‘Have I got to stick my hand in there?’
‘You do, but first put this on.’ Pete handed her what looked like a sleeve of a jumper. ‘They may nip your hand or scratch your arm. This is just a little bit of added protection.’
Verity slipped it on then knelt on the ground.
‘You’ll need to lie on your stomach and slide your hand in slowly. Try not to panic.’
‘It’s the fear of the unknown that worries me,’ she replied, wriggling onto her stomach.
‘You’ll be fine. You’re just feeling for puffins and eggs.’
Slowly and nervously, Verity slipped her hand into the burrow, biting her lip in anticipation of being nipped at any moment. ‘I can feel an egg,’ she said excitedly. ‘Oooh, and another.’
Pete smiled. ‘I can remember the first time I felt an egg in a burrow. It’s like when the chickens lay for the first time, you feel like a proud parent.’
‘Two eggs, two puffins. OUCH! And one nip of the beak,’ she exclaimed, quickly retracting her hand. ‘Gosh, that really does hurt.’ She rubbed the back of the hand.
‘The top of your hand will soon be that numb from the all the nips that you won’t feel a thing by the time you finish today.’
‘And I volunteered for this job because…’
‘Of your love of puffins.’
