ChapterFifteen
Libby was already sitting in the restaurant waiting when Isla breezed in with a big smile on her face and headed towards the table. Taking off her coat she handed it to a nearby waiter and sat down.
‘Good morning!’ trilled Libby.
‘How are you?’ asked Isla. ‘I was worried about you all last night.’
‘Honestly, I’m okay. I was just having a wobble.’
Attempting to be upbeat and pretending that life was hunky-dory clearly wasn’t fooling Isla, who gave her a sceptical look.
‘I suspect you’re still having that wobble. Let’s order some food and you can tell me all about it.’
The waiter arrived and took their order of two full Scottish breakfasts with a pot of tea each. Then Isla folded her arms and leaned on the table. ‘What’s going on?’
Libby trusted Isla. She knew whatever she confided in her friend would be in the strictest confidence, but she needed to be careful not to break Guy’s trust. It wasn’t her place to tell anyone his story.
‘I don’t know what I’m doing,’ she admitted. ‘I thought I did and now I don’t.’ She didn’t say any more while the waiter placed two pots of tea and cups on the table. As soon as he was gone she continued, ‘For the past ten years, I’ve looked after myself and my mental health after…’ Every time she began to mention the early menopause, she found herself close to tears.
Isla reached across the table and placed her hand on top of Libby’s. Isla knew about everything that Libby had gone through. She’d confided in her a few years ago when they’d gone back to Isla’s after a night out and the conversation had turned towards Libby’s love life. Isla couldn’t believe she was single and after Libby revealed that was her choice, the conversation had moved on to the reasons why.
‘I vowed not to let anyone hurt me again. My relationship ended because I wasn’t a full woman.’
‘Stop right there. Your relationship ended because your ex was an asshole. End of. And I don’t ever want to hear you blame yourself.’ Isla was firm. ‘Do you hear me?’
Libby nodded. She knew that Isla was right but every time she thought about the past, she wondered, would they still be together if she could have children? What if?
‘I can say this until I’m blue in the face but youhaveto know your own self-worth. He was not good enough for you.’
‘I love you,’ said Libby, laughing. ‘You put everything into perspective.’
‘That’s what good friends do.’ Isla grinned. ‘So, after you vowed never to entertain a man again…’
‘I threw myself into work.’
‘And became a blooming talented fashion designer, with a brand-new job in New York City. A place I’ve never been!’ Isla poured them both a cup of tea. ‘But why are you suddenly looking glum about that? This is everything you’ve worked for. Or am I wrong?’ Isla was watching her closely.
‘There’s no other way to say it. I’m in a mess, a big fat mess, and I can’t believe I’m going to share this with you now…’ Libby stopped in her tracks as the waiter put their breakfasts down in front of them and brought further condiments to the table. Then he walked away and they were free to continue the conversation, knowing they wouldn’t be overheard.
‘And this big fat mess?’ prompted Isla.
‘I don’t know if I can go to New York,’ Libby admitted.
‘But this is everything you’ve worked for and the job of your dreams. What’s changed?’
‘Being here. Spending time with my family. Flynn and Julia are about to start their life together and have a family, and my dad isn’t getting any younger. If something happens, I’ll be miles away.’
‘I do understand what you’re saying but you knew all this when you applied and accepted the job.’
Libby nodded. ‘I know. It’s what I thought I wanted but as the time to leave gets closer I’m not sure how I feel about it anymore.’ She looked around the room. ‘There’s something about this place. The people, the community…’
‘It’s the Heartcross curse taking hold of you. I knew you wouldn’t get away from it,’ said Isla cheerfully. ‘But what’s the worst that can happen? You go for six months and if it’s not for you, you come home. At least then you’ve given it a go.’
‘I know what you’re saying, and I’ve had that scenario in my head many times. The people in New York have already made me feel so welcome…’
‘But…?’ said Isla. ‘What’s the part you aren’t telling me?’
‘But I’ve got feelings I’ve not experienced in a very long time and I don’t know what to do because it’s complicated.’
