“We both came from a family of betas.” She jerked her head toward the direction we were headed, and I followed her lead, walking beside her. “Both of us are different sub-genders than our families, and because of this, I’ve always thought that we had similarities. The fact that I wasn’t attracted to you even though you are beautiful was another. You felt safe, and I believe that you were the best choice I had. The fact that neither of us was attracted to each other was a plus.”
“By the way, how are you and Jenna?”
The faraway look as her cheeks slightly darkened and the radiant grin on her face only proved how much she was in love.
I was glad that my friend could find time outside of caring for me to be able to have someone else to care about on the space station. It allowed us a sense of time to ourselves and ensured there was a sense of independence between us. In addition, it would help make the transition once the time came for me to leave.
“We’re doing well—or should I say that she’s doing well. Her assignment shows signs of restlessness, and he is about to enter The Den soon, too. This means once both of you are successfully claimed and leave the station, it will allow Jenna and me to decide whether we both want to have another two, have another assignment, or should we try our hand at being an enforcer. It would be nice to be able to leave the station for some time. I would welcome the change as long as we are assigned to keep an eye on the omegas on a planet other than Earth.”
“Yeah, I hope I don’t have to return to Earth myself.” I huffed and frowned at the negative feeling that came from the mere thought of my home planet. “I’ve wanted to go to one of the newly established planets to discover the wonders there. But I guess I won’t have any choice in the end.”
“I’m hoping that being an enforcer will allow us to explore what’s out there too.” She paused and scratched the back of her head as she dodged a pair of Betas walking too close, engrossed in their conversation. “Yeah, we may also remain on the station because other unmated omegas would also need caretakers, and I do enjoy my job. But, it’s just now your process has started. It’s slowly becoming a reality that you won’t need me to look after you much longer. I’m going to miss caring for you after all these years.”
“Same here,” I said, as the negative tingle inside me slowly morphed into an anxious ache. She knew me and had been my stable foundation since I’d been here. And all because I decided to stay off of my suppressants, I would need to be claimed soon, so I wouldn’t have to re-experience an unbearable heat once again. A shiver passed through me, forcing my hands to tighten into fists as I tried to block the horrid memory of my first omega heat from my mind. Thankfully, the station had the resources to help ease everything. I would never be able to thank the betas who tried to fulfill my needs.
“What’s going to happen after I pick my alpha and I begin to establish a pack within his clan?” I muttered, hoping the process wasn’t cut and release, and we would still be able to spend some time together before I left.
They never explained everything that happened after The Den. I’d only learned from other omegas who’d heard from someone else. But nevertheless, the station tried hard to keep us safe and happy, even if it meant leaving us blind to certain aspects.
Happy omega, happy life.
“It all depends on you.” She flicked her guarded gaze at me. “Some omegas want nothing to do with their gammas once they’re claimed. Rather get to their new lives as soon as possible, without any reminder of their past. Others will cling on as much as they can until their need to keep a sort of familiarity in their life fades.”
“I can’t picture myself wanting to go through another sort of abandonment.”
“I hope that is the case,” she replies gently. “You have nothing to worry about. Focus on the task at hand. Once you select your alpha, things will go by quicker than they are now. It will feel like a whirlwind, but you don’t have to worry. I’ll check up on you often as you become more comfortable with your pack and your clan. Once you’re done with their first heat, I will slowly reduce the amount of time needed to investigate your condition to only a few times a year, unless you tell me otherwise.”
“I don’t think I ever want to get to that point.” My throat tightened from the rush of anxiety coursing through my veins. How could the station allow such a thing to exist? How could other omegas be okay with losing their companion that they’d had since puberty just because they moved on to the next chapter of their lives?
“I want you in my life. I don’t want to lose you,” I said, my voice filled with an iron assurance that perhaps would’ve been mistaken for an alpha’s command. “I am not a fool to think we will keep going the way things are now, but you are an important part of me, Quinn. If my future alpha lives on one of the colony planets instead of Earth, would you entertain relocating there as an enforcer?”
“It’s not that simple, Elara.” She gave me a sad smile. “What if Jenna’s omega wants her to follow him wherever he goes? You’re about to start your life. You will want much freedom to shape your new life with your pack and your clan, and soon I will be forgotten. That’s the life of a caretaker. It’s our sacrifice—like our parents had to give us up for Syzygy Station. We care for our assignment, but once they are claimed, there’s no longer a need for us—”
“You keep saying that, but I don’t think you understand.”
“No, Elara,” she corrected, halting in an alcove between two storefront entryways. Her brown eyes searched mine as we faced each other. The walkway crowd continued to pass by us as if we didn’t exist, giving us the illusion of privacy. “I don’t think you understand.” She licked her lips as a sudden wave of her strong scent engulfed me. The aroma of early morning dew on a field of flowers filled my lungs, instantly calming me with its familiarity. “You are resistant because you haven’t found the one, and you are clinging to the idea of keeping our partnership the same. I know it’s scary, and if you have changed your mind and don’t want to continue the process, just let me know. But you can’t keep fabricating some fantasy that you will be able to merge your current life with your future one and believing it will all work out. You can say all you want that you want me near, but once you become enthralled by some lucky alpha and wear his mark on your skin, your need for me will fade. Gammas are the safety blankets—your temporary nest if you have to label it—and once you make your perfect nest, fit for mating and bonding with your pack, you will no longer want me.”
“I hate you that you keep saying that,” I muttered, shaking my head as I tried to resist the lulling comfort of her scent. “There’ll always be a need for you.”
“We’ll see.” She closed her eyes and sighed. “But first, we need to get the last piece of your outfit for tomorrow, unless you have changed your mind.”
“No, I haven’t changed my mind.” Shaking my head, I gave her a sly smirk. “I know what you are trying to do. You are trying to get me to buy some flashy jewelry for tomorrow.”
“You are a gorgeous treasure and deserve to look your best, so you can make all those alphas salivate as soon as their gaze falls on you.” Then, studying me, she grabbed my hand and slowly spun me around, nodding to herself as I halted, facing her. “I don’t want you to show up without any jewelry to go with your gown, even if I have to pay for it myself. You deserve to have something to remember your day from.”
“If that’s what I have to do to make you happy, then I will, and I won’t complain about it.” Her mouth opened as her eyes locked with mine in shock from my lack of resistance. “I’m serious, Quinn. I may not know what my future holds once I walk through the doors of The Den. But I know, for one thing, you’ve been by my side all this time. I’m scared to think of what will happen once I leave here and of what will happen if you are no longer part of my life.”
“Same here. You’ll always be in my thoughts, no matter what happens.” She glanced down at our locked hands and gently released hers from mine. Then, jerking her head toward the crowd, her eyes widened as if from fear of what had happened as she studied the passersby.
Out of respect for Jenna and their relationship, I’d prevented myself from becoming too clingy. She may have been my gamma, but I wasn’t going to allow myself to jeopardize what she had. I wasn’t even jealous of Jenna. Other omegas may have required their gamma to always give their undivided attention to them, which was a natural response, but as I’d gotten older, I knew sooner or later I would have to leave here. It would be unfair to prevent Quinn from creating something for her to look forward to once I was gone.
“Once you pick a piece of jewelry for me, what else do we have to do today to prepare for tomorrow?” I asked, breaking the silence as I grabbed Quinn’s attention once more.
She bobbed her head in thought as she turned toward me.
“I’ve ordered your dress and matching shoes to be delivered to your quarters before dinner. Outside of that, I believe you are ready.”
