Selena
Closing my eyes, I felt the gentle rumble of theAbysstraveling through space and sighed. Finally, I was making my way back home where I belonged, with Kaede as my savior once again.
Smiling, I grabbed one of my favorite nightgowns from the drawers and made my way into the bathroom. I never got a chance to shower while I had been on the asteroid base. They hadn’t offered me a spare outfit and I had been too afraid to jump into the pond or any of the bathing pools while Xenak was about. It was a good thing I had only been there for a few days because I didn’t know how long I could last without basic hygiene.
Standing nude in front of the mirror, I took in the damage this trip had inflicted on me. My silver hair was shorter than any of my nestmates’ and the scar on my chest stood out starkly. Paired with how thin I had become, I wondered how long it would take for me to fully recover.
I knew my hair could grow back and I would fill out once again; those were losses that didn’t matter to me. It was the scar straight down my chest that scared me. What if the mercenaries truly had taken something from me? I wouldn’t have known; I was unconscious for most of the torture. I had to get my body examined as soon as I finished checking on my clan.
Opening the shower, I pushed a few buttons to select the temperature and soap before turning on the system, but for some reason, I couldn’t enter the stall. My feet wouldn’t budge as tears began to stream down my cheeks.
The last time I had showered, I had been kidnapped.
Sobbing, I collapsed to the ground and clutched my legs, burying my head between my knees as I rocked back and forth. Images of light-blue and green blood trickling down my body flashed before my eyes, overriding my senses.
Their blood. Oh, Stars.
My dying nestmates’ blood had covered me as I had tried to scrub myself raw in the shower. My head had rested against the cool metallic wall, the spray beating against my skin while I had waited for the trauma to wash away. Then I had been taken from everything I had known.
“Selena!”
A pair of strong arms scooped me off the floor. I struggled to escape, only to be pinned in place.
“Selena, it’s me,” Kaede begged. “It’s me. No one can hurt you here.”
His voice was like a balm on my soul, numbing the pain, but the wound was still raw. Slumping, I gave up the fight.
I was safe.
He placed me onto his lap, holding me close. “It’s okay, Selena, I’m here.” He cupped my cheek tenderly as if I were the most precious thing in the universe. “You don’t have to be afraid any longer.”
“I can’t… I can’t… the last time I went into a shower…”
“No one can take you, I swear it,” he breathed, kissing my forehead. “I am so sorry that I failed you, Selena. Never again.”
“Kaede,” I sobbed, hugging his chest as I pressed my head against his shoulder. “The blood. The blood. It’s all over me.”
“There is no blood, Selena,” he whispered, rocking me in his lap. “There is no blood, and no one will take you away from me, I promise.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Selena, I’m sorry that I failed you,” he breathed, placing a hand on the back of my head to hold me against him. “I’m the reason you’ve become this broken female before me. If not for my failures, you would be enjoying yourself with your clan instead of racing against time to save your dying mates.”
“But, Kaede, you didn’t do anything!” I protested, studying the male who had come to rescue me once again. “You’ve always been there for me, but that day…”
I peered down at my hands again, finding them covered with my nestmates’ blood.
“I keep seeing blood, Kaede,” I muttered, glancing back up at him. “Can you see the blood?”
“There is no blood, Selena,” he repeated, shaking his head. “It’s just your mind playing tricks on you.”
Sobbing, I buried my head in his chest, desperate to hide from the pain.
“I’m a failure, Selena. Every time I look at you, I see my mistakes—every misstep compounded—and the only way I could save you was by placing an Oetsae in you. Now you can’t even shower without fearing that someone might break in and hurt you once again.”
“I would’ve gotten the Oetsae sooner or later. It was just a matter of time.”
“I disagree.” Kaede sighed. “The necklace was a failsafe I hoped never to use. Instead, I have become the worst bodyguard I could be. Not only have I failed to protect you and your clan, but I allowed our enemies to torture you and took too long to find you. Worst of all, I placed Euouae inside you without your consent. I will never forgive myself for what happened to you.” He paused, the silence heavy. “I almost lost you, Selena, before I even had you.”
