But I wouldn’t. Not when she didn’t want it. Not when I couldn’t give her anything but misery.
I pressed a hand to the wall, taking a single long breath to slow my still stuttering pulse.
How had this need grown so intense over only hours? On the stairs, even before I’d caught her, my want for her was so desperate, I’d felt ill. She’d looked so perfect; so innocent in her careful steps, but so fucking sexy with her pants hitched up tight against those strong thighs. When I first stopped her from falling, I’d nearly let her go simply so she’d have to land on me. So I could feel the delicious pressure of her in my arms, where I think my body thought she belonged. I think I wanted to hold her that way so I could pretend, for the briefest moment, that she was mine.
I wanted to consume her. To keep her here and never let her go.
I ran my tongue along my teeth, certain I’d find fangs.
“Let me guess,” Winona said, startling me. “You don’t know how to work these.”
I dropped my hand and straightened, but didn’t turn around. If her presence behind me was making gooseflesh erupt across the back of my neck, what would my face show?
By her crisp and sarcastic tone, she was clearly not affected the way I was by what had just happened.
I’d never,ever,acted only on my own attraction. It was another hard line. One I wouldn’t budge on, no matter the circumstances.
I was grateful for the surge of annoyance that sparked through me when her words registered. They tamed at least the most lethal edges of my nerves.
“I can figure it out,” I snapped.
I hadn’t done my own laundry in probably close to a decade. But I’d constructed whole software systems. I could absolutely figure it out. I pressed a button on the one on the left. The washer, presumably, if things moved in order from left to right, though the machines looked exactly the same. Itdinged to life. But there were no labels on the touch display, just an array of symbols, none of which made any sense. Sprinkles in a bowl. A concentric circle.
I yanked the door open, throwing the clothes in before realizing I was only supposed to dry them.
“Fuck.” I pulled them back out, hearing the softest snicker of laughter behind me.
“I’m glad you’re having fun,” I said.
“I’d pop some corn if I could.” Winona’s voice was chirpy with mirth.
I didn’t like how unraveled her happiness made me feel. But she reminded me she hadn’t eaten.
Luckily, this one had a button that simply said, “start”. After powering it on, I jabbed my finger on that button and held my breath. Miraculously, the barrel inside made a soft starting-up whirr as it began a slow rotation.
I turned around, victorious, realizing too late that this display of immense privilege was nothing to be proud of.
“Washing my own clothes is inefficient,” I said defensively.
That made it infinitely worse. The smirk on Winona’s face grew, her head nodding. “Of course. Efficiency first.”
I was tempted to cross the space and wrap my hands around her hips once more, this time to sit her up on the counter on the other side of the room. I could do that quite expertly. Or I could just lift her out of my way. But I didn’t trust myself to touch her a second time. Plus, she might knock me out.
I’d probably like that, too.
“I’ll get you some food,” I grumbled, to save me from embarrassing myself further.
Winona followed me out of the room. “Do youhaveany food?” There was a sing-song lilt to her voice. She soundedhappy. “Or are you going to go outside and take down a deer?”
This was worse. Much worse. I was excited by her being pissed off. But turns out I fucking loved her happy.
Still, the last thing I needed to do was show her that. I flung her a look over my shoulder as I reached the kitchen. “Is it fun? Being irritating?”
“More fun than failing at basic adult functions, I assume.”
I placed my hands on the top of the kitchen island to keep them from doing anything stupid. “I can do things.”
“Mmhmm.” Thatmmhmmwas very close to aSure, buddy.But there was a smile on those pretty pink lips. I felt a sudden deep gratitude for my incompetence.
