Raven turned in his seat, looking out the window for a second before focusing his stare right back on Maxim, one hand closing around Maxim’s forearm where he operated the gear shift.
“Then what are you doing?What is this?What’s going to happen to me?What’s going to happen to me now…?”
In the space of those few words, he went from angry tears to exhausted ones.Maxim decelerated and down-shifted before taking a left into the parking space of an electronics store.He turned off the engine so he could give Raven his full attention.
The young vampire was still digging his fingers into Maxim’s arm, but he was hiding his face, his tears.
“I can’t decide that.You get to decide what happens next.And then the thing that happens after that, you get to decide that too.One decision after the next.”Raven was trembling, wiping his eyes on the big sleeve.Maxim had raised his left hand before he knew what he was doing, but he stopped himself just short of touching Raven.“I’ll stay with you though.I won’t leave.”
I’ll keep you safe,Maxim wanted to say.When she’d found him, back when he was still human, his vampire mother had told him that, over and over, that he was safe.She’d kept her word, true, but looking back, it had never been the words that had helped him trust her.
I’ll make sure you can find your way back to yourself like she did for me, and like she did, I will show you through my deeds that I can protect you.
Maxim remained right where he was, allowing Raven his tears.It took a long while before the young vampire’s grip eased, but it did.
Chapter 5
Ravenwastired.Hefelt stupid too, but much like the traffic noises outside the car, which was moving smoothly again, that was distant, almost like he wasn’t quite himself, like he hadn’t been quite himself when he’d cried like an idiot in front of this hunter he didn’t even know.
He sagged in his seat, wanting a nap, wanting to close his eyes and forget.But what if…He glanced at Maxim, who was baring his teeth at a car that had just cut in front of him.No, he seems fine.Maybe.Unless he’s pretending.Unless it’s all pretending.But then… I’ll wait until he takes me home.Then I can think.I can find out…whether anyone heard.About what happened to me.
Raven decided that worrying about what people knew had to wait until he was back at the dorm.It allowed his mind to stay in the place of uncertainty about whether Maxim was actually really taking him there.Raven usually took the bus, sometimes the subway, and so far, the general direction was right.
Then, all of a sudden, the phone started ringing again, the noise coming over the car’s sound system and making Raven jump in his seat, the exhaustion leaving him rapidly, only to be replaced by the pounding of his heart.
“Just the phone.Just Heath,” Maxim said, then he turned and smiled at Raven.“He misses me, you see.”He hit the answer button on the wheel.“Darling?”
“I talked to Gordon, and he said his maker took him to the movie theater, and they watchedThe Birdsthree times in a row.They didn’t leave between shows and didn’t pay for the extra go-arounds, totally freeloading, but I was thinking we could do that.NotThe Birdsthough.I don’t like that movie.But maybe something sweet?We can use the screen from my office.I made sure we have snacks.You know, blood snacks.”
Maxim cocked his head and clicked his tongue.“Heath, dear, you want to have a movie night with me?”
“What?No!I mean, technically.But for Raven, you know, in case he’s restless later.I asked Bryan to set up the screen upstairs.He likes the idea.”
Raven tensed, and Maxim turned to face him.“It’s fine.He means later.After the dorms.”
“But…” Raven felt his mouth go dry, all the questions that a part of him knew he needed to ask congealing like sticky molasses.
“Oh, you’re still in the car?”Heath cackled.“Getting slow, old bat?Anyway, Raven, what do you like?Gordon recommended a bunch of Kawaii Demon Hunter anime, but I don’t know about those.Bryan has a list with rom-coms about people inheriting houses and castles and shit, because of course he does.Do not give Maxim any sort of veto or decisive power whatsoever or we will be watching some weird experimental French flick with subtitles.”
Raven nodded.He knew nodding was not a good response when someone was talking to you over the phone, but the situation didn’t feel real.It was like he was a passenger in his own body in that moment, just…observing from far, far away.
“Darling, maybe we can discuss that later, hmm?Be a dear and take a break.”
“If you tell me to touch grass one more fucking time, I will do something drastic.”
Maxim’s fingers drummed out a rhythm on the wheel.“What will you do, darling?”
“Your phone number might end up in the hands of some middle management clerk at the Forum.”
Maxim gasped.“You wouldn’t.”
“Wouldn’t I?”
Maxim groaned the way a stage actor in an Oscar Wilde play might.“Whatever happened to you, darling?You were the sweetest boy, cuddling your dolls and mistaking your teddy bear’s ear for a pacifier.Why, when I’d change your nappies, you’d—”
“Do not fucking talk about diaper changes over the phone!Fucking hell.I gotta go.We have snacks here, and the screen is ready.See you later.”
Heath hung up, and Maxim turned to Raven and shrugged.“He would giggle and make the cutest baby noises and grasp for my fingers.”The driver who’d cut in in front of him hit the brakes, hard.Maxim honked the horn, possibly harder.“Steaming excrement of diseased swine!Pay heed to the road!”
