“Ohhh.Oh, shit.That was—well, I just sounded like I need a fucking sensitivity seminar.”
Jason let his laugh fade into coughing.“Dude, you’re an equestrian.We can ignore it.”
“Probably won’t be able to forget it though,” Raven said.
Heath pressed his lips together before he said, “Let’s see how you feel after a few shots, then.Wait!I was going to say, I’m glad we’re friends, and if you need me to help you with therapy—when you’re ready, I mean—I can help.I’ve been reading up on it, you know?Okay.That’s all I wanted to say.”He stood.“I’ll go order shots to help us collectively forget the last five minutes.You guys watch our bottle.”
Jason waited until Heath was at the bar before he said, “He’s…quirky.Are you okay?”
Raven thought about that.He didn’t feel the need to run and hide.Strangely, he felt… Seen was probably a good word.Heath and Jason knew.He didn’t have to tell them, so there was nothing to really hide from them.And they were still here, even when he felt so different—some days more, some days less, always just enough to know he wasn’t himself anymore.
And yet, Heath and Jason didn’t think he was too broken to go to a place like this with them.
In his pocket, Raven closed his hand around the water bottle, making a conscious effort to mind his strength and not squeeze hard enough to make the plastic groan.“Yes, actually.”
Jason nodded.“Okay.Good.But the junk talk was suspicious though, right?”
Raven tilted his head to the side.“Suspicious?”
Jason surreptitiously gestured at the bar, where Heath was explaining whatever shots he had in mind for them.“I mean he was… It was basically like he was…giving you the green light, right?Not that you should—I mean, what do I know?Nothing.The answer is nothing.No preconceived thoughts in my brain whatsoever, and no judgments either.But I was thinking, it was sort of a Freudian slip, right?And that’s… Would you say that’s good to know, maybe?”
Jason looked as if he expected Raven to know what he was talking about.Raven wasn’t sure he did.
“Do you…mean about therapy?”
Jason bobbed his head once.“Therapy.Right.Wow.You two are like peas in a pea salad.Pea salad?Hmm.Dude, I think I like this champagne.Hey, on a serious note, I also volunteer to be your therapy support buddy.Not sure what I’d do, but I’ll get into it, if you want me to.”
He will, won’t he?And he’s not just saying that.
For the first time since he’d awoken as a vampire, Raven considered that option.The option of asking for someone else’s help in order to understand what had happened to him.Well, he understood it.To a degree, he could quantify it, except if he tried to do that out loud, he was pretty sure his voice would break before he was done.All of that was a strange thought to have, and one that some part of him knew he should feel guilty for, given how vaguely improper it was.
But all of it is improper.No.All of it is…something.Raven was sure Maxim would know, would at least be able to say the right thing.Maxim helped me more than anyone.Raven thought back to that night when he’d come to the stupid conclusion that sneaking into Maxim’s bedroom and…offering himself was the right option.He shivered, shame creeping through his insides.Why did I ever think that was a good idea?Maybe someone else, like a therapist…maybe they can help me understand that?
Heath came back and sat down heavily.“They wouldn’t let me take the tray.They say it’s a fire hazard.As if I’m a fire hazard.Are you guys finishing the bottle?”
“Nope, you go right ahead.”Jason slid it across the table until it stood right in front of Heath.
“Don’t mind if I do.”
“What do you mean, fire hazard?”Raven asked.
Heath, his eyes on his glass while he poured himself more champagne, gestured vaguely in the direction of the bar.
“I told them I want those shots that you light on fire, a whole tray of them, and they said they’d bring it over.Wouldn’t let me have it.”He poured the champagne his glass wouldn’t hold into Jason’s.“You’re going to take a photo with me and the drinks on fire, and then you’re going to show it to the old bat.”
“I don’t understand what it is with you and him and you having to drink,” Raven said.
Heath snorted.“My forebearers allegedly could hold their liquor, and he likes to tease me as if I can’t, but I can.It’s just him being…eh, old, I guess.Old people have old standards, you know?”
Jason made a thoughtful noise.“It probably works differently for you.Drinking, I mean.As a half vampire, your body has to work harder to deal with it, doesn’t it?”
Heath slurped his champagne since the glass was full to the brim, his brow furrowed with concentration.He emptied the glass, then put it back on the table with a clinking noise.
“You know what?That makes sense.You’re right.It’s just the old bat being unreasonable again.Like he always fucking is.”
“What old bat?”The bouncer with the Russian accent was walking toward their table, a tray covered in lit shot glasses balanced on three fingers.“Did you see a bat here, sugar bear?”
“I don’t even know why you’re calling me that.Are those our drinks?”
