“Not really.” I close the door to my office so Khesan and Shathar won’t hear while they get ready for bed. “I don’t know how I’m going to be able to pick one, Amara. I feel like whenever we get close, I’m hesitant because I know I’m going to have to say goodbye to one of them at the end of this.”
Amara gasps. “You can’t think of it like that. They both came here knowing it was a gamble as to whether it would work out. You have to look out for you, Fiona. You’re deciding on your forever partner. You want to make the right decision, don’t you?”
My answer comes out tiny. “Yeah, of course.”
“Then you’re going to have to push through. Set the guilt aside and really put your all into your relationships. Stop hesitating, start making moves.”
I wince. “Making moves?”
“Yeah! How will you know which one of them is right for you if you don’t explore your relationship more?”
“Do you mean, like, sex?” I ask hoarsely.
“That is exactly what I mean. Explore these feelings you have with each of them, so you can make a fully informed decision when the time comes.”
I hate that she’s right. I can’t let my anxiety over the future get in the way of the now. I have to embrace the opportunity to get to know both Khesan and Shathar before the thirty days are up.
“Thanks, Amara. I think I needed someone to tell me that.”
“I’m happy to be that person,” she chirps. “Now go enjoy your two alien husbands.”
With that, she hangs up. I put my phone away and square my shoulders as I head back out into the living room. Shathar stands in the kitchen, and he glances up at me with a smile when I appear.
“Wanted to say goodnight,” he says as he approaches me. His eyes are soft as he brings his finger up to my cheek and gently strokes it. “Despite the circumstances, I’m grateful that I came here and met you.”
For a moment, I worry about Khesan coming downstairs, but then shake it off. I can’t let fear get in the way of discovering emotional truth and connection.
“Same,” I tell Shathar. “I know the situation isn’t ideal, but I’m glad you’re here, too. You have such a relaxed energy, it brings me back to earth, if you know what I mean.”
Shathar grins before he leans down and pecks me on the lips. His hands curl around my hips, his claws lightly digging into my butt. Thinking of what Amara said, I kiss him deeper, harder, and he returns the gesture in kind.
Eventually we pull away, both of us gasping for air. Shathar gazes at me with hooded eyes, his usually slitted pupils now wide and dilated. He leans down once more to nip my lip, and I almost moan at the brief painful sensation.
“I suppose I should go to bed,” I say, against my will. I wouldn’t mind more of this, but it’s getting late. “Work tomorrow. But then we’ll all go out.”
That’s when I hear Khesan’s voice over my shoulder. “Go out? Where?”
I startle, Shathar’s arms still around me. He doesn’t let go as Khesan comes down the stairs, and they stare at one another, their fans starting to lift. But then Khesan sighs and lowers his own, like he’s giving up.
“I’m just here for water.” He lifts a glass and fills it under the sink.
I hurry to explain. “Amara invited all of us out for drinks tomorrow night.”
“What will we drink?” asks Shathar. He retracts his hands, though reluctantly.
“Well, you can have anything you want, but I usually have some alcohol.”
Khesan cocks his head. “My translator is offering a fermented liquid that leaves you intoxicated.”
“Yep!” I say. “That’s it.”
“Perhaps like our abonga?” Shathar suggests. “It is a fermented fruit drink that, I believe, serves much the same purpose.”
“Ah, yes!” Khesan clicks his claws together. I give him a perplexed look, not sure what that gesture means, but then Shathar does it back to him. “Does this alcohol make you feel… happy? And free?”
I nod. “Just like that.”
“We make it from the abo fruit on Arshur,” Shathar explains. “It is a wonderful beverage, if dangerous.”
