She made a noise that told me she disagreed. “I think it’d be more perfect if you just come inside me.”
I laughed, shaking my head. “What if I said I don’t want to have sex before marriage?”
She giggled, looking bemused. “That ship sailed, Gulliver. But I suppose we could wait if you want.” She sat back up, her skin glistening.
“Pass. I’m enjoying your frustration though. It’s making me feel very wanted.”
Her laugh was like music. “Good to know I’m stroking your ego in just the right way.”
“That’s what it’s all about.” It really wasn’t. “I think we’ll need to shower again.’
She nodded, glancing down at our bodies. “I have an idea of what you could do in the shower, you know, just to make sure the jellybean gets enough of those feel-good hormones.”
“Yeah, what’s that?”
“I’ll show you.”
We’d laughed in the shower because it was really too small to do much other than stumble around each other and try not to slip. I managed to make her come with my mouth and she returned the favour when we were back in bed. I wasn’t going to complain about that – watching the woman you love with your cock in her mouth is probably one of life’s highlights and I considered giving my fictional detective the same opportunity in the current work in progress.
We headed back to Anglesey after a quick walk around the walls, taking in the sites from higher up. I held Iris’ hand and we talked about all sorts of irrelevant things that weren’t to do withbabies or sex or our work and it felt like the most normal thing in the world.
I’d envied my brothers and their relationships. They’d both managed to find someone with whom they could be themselves. Finn was driven and ambitious, overly focused sometimes and something of a perfectionist; Ruby had a similar drive, although hers was around research and the sea. She had a bigger picture of the world and the environment and she kept him grounded, rooted in reality and remembering what mattered more than how much beer his brewery was selling.
Roe could be a workaholic and addicted to things on a screen. Freya was a child of the universe, preferring yoga on the beach and being outside in nature with no connection to the internet, and somehow, they balanced each other out. Roe would give up everything if it would make Freya happy, but then, she’d probably do the same for him – maybe not as extreme.
When I’d first met Iris at Ivy’s funeral, we’d both been devastated. We were the sum of our grief and our loss, ships passing because we’d been rerouted. Then after that, the letters, the meet-up, the freedom we’d found in our friendship had led me to seeing her differently. She wasn’t just my best friend’s little sister, she became my best friend.
Best friend I wanted to do dirty things with.
I teased her on the drive home; my hand on her leg, rising up to tease closer to where she wanted me to be, double entendres that I could deny when she picked up on them and accuse her of having a dirty mind, and a few detailed descriptions of what I wanted to do to her when she eventually begged.
We both knew the begging wasn’t going to happen.
I’d give in way before that.
We arrived home mid-afternoon and headed for lunch at the Puffin Inn. It was a Friday, so highly likely my brothers would be around at some point because it was poet’s day – piss off early,tomorrow’s Saturday day, and by mid-afternoon on a Friday they’d both usually put in enough hours to pay themselves a stupid amount of overtime anyway.
I was right. Finn and Rowan were already there, both sitting down at a table with their laptops in front of them, not having clocked off quite yet. Finn had Elias with him, who was trying to colour in a picture of a tiger; Elias looked tired. Roe had Calla next to him in a buggy, fast asleep clutching a plushy tiger that I recalled as initially belonging to Elias.
Neither of them looked up when we sat down. Elias cuddled up to my side and offered me a crayon, pointing to where he wanted it to go. Eventually he climbed on my knee and started to doze off before his dozy father realised we were there.
“I could’ve kidnapped your son, you know?”
Finn looked up, eventually, half shocked that I was there. “Shit, you could. Never mind, we have a replacement at home. He’s asleep. How did you manage that?”
“His sparkling personality.” Roe shot me a grin and I realised we were both wearing pretty much the same clothes – jeans and black hoodies, the only difference being the logo on the front. “I knew you were there. How was York? How’s my niece or nephew?” He leaned over to Iris and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Nice video, by the way.”
We’d shared the video of the scan with my brothers and their wives. In fact, it’d been Iris who’d shared it because like she’d said, she had no one of her own to share it with.
“Thank you. It’s weird to think that I have a human growing inside me.” She patted her stomach. “I still haven’t gotten used to that.”
Finn closed his laptop and picked up his beer. “Ruby was like that with Elsie. Elsie moved a lot more than Eli did and we’d see this foot or hand appearing through Ruby’s stomach. It was like another sequel toAlien.”
“Where is Elsie?” I glanced at Elias, who was still asleep.
“Oh shit!” Finn looked round. “I’ve left her on the beach.” Then his face cracked into a smile. “She’s with Ruby. We divided and conquered today.”
Roe shook his head. “It wouldn’t surprise me if you did leave her somewhere one day. She’ll probably take over the world while she’s unsupervised too. ‘Five-year-old becomes president of the United States.’ I can see it now.” He bent down and wrestled Calla out of her pushchair, putting her on his knee. She was awake now, staring at me with eyes that were exactly like mine.
