I caught him looking at me when he thought I was distracted by food, little glances from smouldering eyes that made me feel warmer than I had done when I was sunbathing.
When we’d walked back to the chateau along a newly paved path in white stone, lit subtly with spotlights placed next to it, his hand had brushed against the small of my back, light touches that sent shivers over my skin, and I longed for the guts to stop in my stride and kiss him like I’d done before.
The chateau had been quiet and still when we got back, the time after midnight. We’d spent longer than anticipated at the barn, sipping wine then coffee, dining on small tapas-style plates that were delicious and light, easy to eat, and working with the wines that Gérard talked us through.
We paused at the bottom of the grand staircase, and for a second, I wondered if Jesse was going to pick me up and carry me up to bed. I wondered whether in that slight moment we were on the same paragraph on the same page.
He didn’t.
Instead, he moved me into an awkward hug and said he was going to make a quick drink before heading to bed.
That quick drink took longer than the hour I was awake for, trying to read my book but spending more time with my head flitting between a scene for the new novel I was starting and wondering about Jesse.
He was avoiding me.
By the time he came to the room, I must’ve been asleep. When I woke up to the sound of birds singing and the voices of children outside, the bed was empty of him, if he’d even slept there.
What I knew, as I summarised while making myself a breakfast platter from the meats and fruit and cheese that were laid out on the table, was that Jesse was avoiding what we could enjoy.
I knew why. He’d explained as much, but it wasn’t enough to make me believe it was worth it.
I slipped away from the kitchen with my food and my phone, aware that it was only just after seven back home in Manchester, but that was not a reason to not phone my brother.
Nate picked up on the third ring, sounding pleased to hear from me, rather than annoyed from having been disturbed from sleep or something else.
“You okay, Jez? Everything good?”
“Everything’s fine. This place is gorgeous.” I spent a few minutes telling him about the chateau and the pool. “We’re heading out to see two other vineyards today before Simone Wood and her husband cook for us tonight.”
“If you think it’s a good investment, see if they’ll accept the same as what Jesse’s putting in. Is he still planning to invest?”
“Definitely. I think last night made his mind up.”
“What was last night?”
I talked him through the food and the wine, leaving out the details that were clearer in my mind than anything to do with the meal or the drink.
“It sounds amazing.” He groaned. “I’ll see about taking Amber next summer.”
“How is she?” I’d only been away a few days but I did miss them, Nate, the kids, and the woman who would probably be my sister-in-law before too long. I’d seen the hearts in her eyes when she looked at my brother. He didn’t even try to hide his.
“Doing really well. Actually resting. The girls keep trying to look after her, which isn’t always ending well. When you’re back, would you babysit for a night so I can take her for a spa break?”
“Course.” Leon the nanny was around, but Nate was fixed on him only having the girls overnight when he had away games. He preferred my nieces to be looked after by friends or family if he was away playing. “Just get it booked. Nate?” My heart raced a little.
“Jez?”
“I wouldn’t usually discuss things like feelings with you — ”
He laughed. “Thank god for that.”
“But how would you feel if I asked Jesse out? He’s your friend and teammate, and I wouldn’t want to make things awkward for you.”
My brother was quiet, which worried me. Nate was rarely completely quiet; he laughed a lot, and while sometimes he didn’t say much, what he said was generally filled with a smile.
I broke his quiet. “I know you know about the ex-girlfriend. The one who tried to go to the press.”
“Jesse told you?” Nate sounded surprised.
