“Time apart is good. Gives you a chance to miss each other.” I couldn’t say this from experience.
“I get that. We don’t do well with time apart. Not that we spend a ton of time together because we’re both so busy, but we have the knowledge that we’re coming home to be together, even if we don’t have a full conversation that evening because we’re too tired or too busy. We’re still there together.” The sigh she gave made me want to splash water in her martini.
“You mean you fuck like bunnies.”
“There is that. I intend to make the most of it before we breed. I hear from Vanessa that a baby kills your sex life.” She held up her glass as if to toast her sister in law.
“Unless you’re Claire and Killian,” I named her other sister in law. “In which case, having a baby means you’re uber fertile and up conceiving.”
Victoria smiled, one that spoke of secrets and understanding. “She has the whole needing babies thing going on. They have stuff to catch up on too. She’s happy.”
“Which is good.”
“Do you want kids?”
I was floored by the question.
“I don’t know. I’m at the age where it’s becoming too late.”
“How old are you?”
“Thirty-seven. And I’ve enjoyed every month.” It was true. I’d made mistakes, but none had been catastrophic or irreparable and I’d learned from them all.
“That isn’t too old.”
“Vic, I don’t have a man I’m about to marry or make a long term commitment to. I’m not broody enough – or at all – to go down the donor route or adoption. I’m looking at significantly expanding my business so what I acknowledge is that it might not happen. And if it doesn’t, I’m at peace with that.” There was no protesting in what I said. I’d considered why I didn’t have a child before, many times. Did I want a baby? I didn’t want sleepless nights or the restriction on my social life or working life. I knew it brought countless rewards – I saw friends who glowed with the pride that only a mother could have – but I wasn’t envious.
“I’m putting you on the list as a babysitter.” She smiled triumphantly.
“I won’t give up saying ‘shit’. Vanessa’s tried and failed.”
She waved her hands about as a response.
There was a splash and Maxwell and Seph appeared, almost like mermen, but not. Both looked a little displaced, and I suspected that their day of adventure had been eventful.
“Children have to learn what words are appropriate to say and when,” Seph offered, clearly having heard the last part of our conversation. “Part of life. I don’t believe in censorship.”
“Half of what comes out of your mouth needs to be censored.” Max raised a hand and pulled at Seph’s hair. Not hard, but enough to give a warning. “Details on how you fucked such and such a person are not suitable for the ears of anyone under the age of twenty-one. Or my ears. Or anyone else’s.”
Seph just laughed. And it was then I wished he’d find his somebody that he could come home to instead of an empty house that I knew he couldn’t stand.
“How was the viewing?” Seph asked, causing a wave of water to flick everywhere as he got into the pool.
I laughed. There was no other response. “Turns out the vendor only wants to sell to a married couple – or one who is going to get married.”
“Shit,” Max slipped into the water more gracefully than Seph and curled straight up to Victoria, who seemed happy to have him there. Clearly all was forgiven.
“And Liam was looking round too.”
There was a silence. One that could’ve been carved with a knife into wee small slices.
“Liam as in Leif – who’s staying here?” Seph looked around as if he was about to appear.
“The one and only.”
“So what did you do?” This was Max.
Calm, assuming I had a plan.
