With William.
“I’m not in the mood for dancing.”
“Blair…” He shakes his head.
“I’ll talk to him, drink with him, but I’m not pretending anything that isn’t true.”
“Is this because - ”
He stops, a dignitary and his wife passing us. She gives me a knowing smile and clutches her husband’s arm. I know them, recognise them as English delegates, or him at least.
“Let’s socialise.” I take my brother’s arm, give the smile I’ve practiced enough so it no longer seems fake, and we enter the sunroom that’s now surrounded by storms.
* * *
I don’t see Ben. Waiting-on staff pass by with trays of champagne and delicate morsels to ward off any hunger for those silly enough to have avoided lunch so as to not spoil their appetite. English sparkling wine is also served, trying to balance our cultures. What we can’t source in Scotland we buy in from Europe, with whom our trade deals are strong. But today and tonight aren’t about those divisions; we’re meant to be working towards healing those fractures between our countries, only not everyone will have the same agenda. Peace isn’t always beneficial for everyone.
William catches my eye from across the room. He’s talking with Murray and a few others. My brother has been captured by an English woman who is something to do with diplomatic relations. Elise is glaring.
The prime minister lifts his champagne to me, giving me a foppish grin. It’s genuine and I know he’s going to come over, seeing him excuse himself.
“You’re alone.”
I’m staring out of the window at the loch and the rain hammering down on it.
“I’m in a room full of people. I don’t have that privilege.”
“I know what you mean.”
I’m not sure he does.
“You must get bored of these events.”
I don’t. I’ve grown up with them and I like to watch, see, predict which beds people will go to, or who will be the one to spill secrets they had no right to share. But tonight I’m tetchy. Glancing around the room, I don’t see Ben. There’s no way he’ll be having a day off when this is occurring, not this early into a new job.
“I enjoy them. The castle is so quiet when there isn’t an event on, but today has been busy.” It’s the correct response, lining up a reason for not dancing or conversing or being charming. And it has been a long day.
He smiles and I feel sorry for him. “I know how you feel. I find the events where I have to go out and meet the most tiring and you’ve had that today. Only they’ve been in your home. Does that not feel intrusive?”
“It’s what I’m used to. Just like your royal family used to have to open up their residences.” But we don’t do it for the money to upkeep the places. There’s enough investment that comes in from other countries, secret billionaires with their own private interests.
The world is never as straightforward as just anything.
We don’t need to tangle a web to deceive.
“I’m not sure I’d want strangers in my bedroom. I like to keep some things private.”
He’s not lying. There’s little about William’s private life although the gutter press has been trying to dig as much as they can into who he’s slept with. Other than a couple of photographs taken while he was at university, there is nothing.
“The room the public sees is fake. It’s what would be mine if I lived in that part of the castle. We have our own wing.” I’m not telling him anything he wouldn’t be able to find out and he probably knows already.
“It sounds mysterious.” His smile is teasing. “How royalty actually live.”
“Probably pretty much the same as you.”
I take another glass of champagne as the tray passes near. Two is my maximum before eating, especially if I want to keep a memory of people and what they say and do. There’s no chance to relax, not for anyone.
“You don’t have any secret passages or anything?”
