“I was twenty-one when I had Lauren. I learned very quickly what to do. And I didn’t ask if you knew how to manage a baby; I asked if you wanted kids.”
“I don’t know.” She paused. “I’ve never been in a position where it’s been an option. When I was with Phillip I thought about it, but then opening Blue was the big thing. Obviously, when I was with Eliot – it was never going to happen.”
“What about now?”
Her hand crossed over to the top of my jeans, waking up my cock. It didn’t take much, not where she was involved.
“Maybe. I’m old enough to know that I don’t have long if it’s something I want to pursue. If it wasn’t to happen, I don’t think I’d be devastated. What about you? You’ve already done all the midnight feeds and nappy changes.”
I shrugged. “I’m open to it. I loved having Lauren. Still do. I’m not looking for someone to be a baby-mother for me. But if I was serious about someone and that was what they wanted, I’d be happy to go with it.”
Her hand went to my face and she cupped my jaw, just like I’d cupped hers.
“You’re really serious about us, aren’t you?”
My chest tightened and I wondered if we weren’t on the same page.
“Yes.”
“I am too. I’m scared. But I’m serious. The baby thing – I don’t know. Is it okay to not know?”
“Of course. I just wanted…” Fuck, I was a dick. “Wanted to see what you thought.”
“I think you’re amazing.”
My shoulder relaxed.
“I think I’m amazing too….”
She dug an elbow in my stomach and laughed. “You’re such an arse!”
“We should go to bed. I think I need another way to take my mind off things.” She tapped my cock that was now fully hard.
“Happy to oblige.” I picked her up, making her squeal. Planning other ways of making her squeal.
* * *
Nothing good is ever goingto be at the end of a two am phone call. Like most people who needed a degree of sleep, I set my phone to night mode with only key numbers being able to ring through.
The rude blare of a ringtone broke the quiet of Simone’s house and for a moment as I woke, I had no idea where I was. Sleep so far had been deep, my woman’s body curled into me, the decision that we’d stay at Simone’s for the next few days at least a pacifier for both of us.
I reached onto my nightstand once I realised it was my phone and not hers and saw Casey’s name flashing up on the screen.
It felt as if a bomb had gone off in my chest because there was no way that Casey would call at this time if it wasn’t something bad.
“Case?”
Simone sat up next to me, flicking on a dim light and watching me with worry in her eyes.
“Fuck, Jack.” She was crying.
“Casey – what is it? Where are you?”
“Hospital.” The cries had turned to sobs. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. It’s Robert…”
I knew then. I didn’t need need any more words because I knew then that this had been the phone call we’d waited so many years for, the one that would fracture our family photographs and break my mother’s heart.
All our hearts.
