He shoots me a glare that should scare me. It’s like he’s trying to laser off my face with his eyes.
I shake my head, barely able to believe this is Iri, master plotter and planner. Quiet ruler of all of our lives,
Now he’s clueless. Stumped. Apparently losing his cool over one small woman.
He doesn’t even know her. He just decided one day he was obsessed with Saint Madison and that finding her was the solution to everything.
The long lonely nights. The endless touring. The way the four of us have been drifting further and further apart over the past couple of years.
I told him he was nuts, but he ignored me.
“How about you try talking to her? Join the two dickheads out there and try to get to know her and let her know you back. Good bits, bad bits, indifferent bits.”
“All the bits,” he mutters.
Then maybe he’ll shake off this obsession and we can move on to planning whatever the fuck comes next.
I’m cool with this being our final tour. Never say never and all that, but we’ll all be happy for an extended break.
Fuck, my body aches. I feel like I could nap for a week and it still wouldn’t be enough.
Iri nods, getting to his feet and brushing off imaginary dust from his pants. “Get to know her. I can do that.” He’s still muttering to himself as he heads out of the room, only pausing once he’s out the door and I don’t follow.
“You’re not coming?” he asks.
I shake my head. I can only hold their hands so much. “It’s all on you three.”
Fools.
As I pass the living room on the way to my room, I catch a hint of Sin snorting a laugh and brush past the sound, just like I’m brushing past how arguing with her has somehow been the most entertaining part of my month.
I head to my room to package up her badges, ready to send it to the trauma center where my mom works.
Alone. Just how I like it.
It takes me all of a minute to remember I actually fucking hate being alone. It feels like ants are crawling beneath my skin. If we were in the city, I’d head out and see if I could find someone to distract me for a few hours. Or I’d hang out with Cal and we’d watch a movie or shoot the shit.
But there’s nothing for miles and miles out here, and Cal’s busy right now. Caught up with Sin and there’s no way I’m going in there with them.
I’d like to fire up my bike from the garage and go for a long ride, but there’s something wrong with it and I haven’t had time to find someone to fix her up.
In the safety of my room, I slip off my shades and rub the bridge of my nose and my ears with a sigh.
It’s a temporary relief from being always guarded and ready in case my shades slip and my monstrous nature is exposed.
That’s why I stick to casual shit with my relationships these days. A quick fuck where I’m always behind her. No risk of being exposed.
No risks at all.
Chapter 18
Cal
Sin’s in the kitchen, downing a glass of water when Micah and I finally get our asses in gear and go after her. She eyes the two of us warily as we charge in.
“Do you want to go for a walk outside? The forest is really beautiful around here,” I tell her, feeling like a prize dolt as the words spill out. All I know is, we need to fix things and being outside always clears my head. Thankfully, she nods and I blow out a relieved breath.
At least we haven’t fucked up so badly she’s stopped speaking to us.
