He thought it was an insult.
A dig at him, a colossal display of impropriety in a way we just don’t do, a way that breaks the rules.
But he kept it with him, at the school, in that drawer—and why he chose last night to dab it on his sweater…
I almost don’t know the answer to that.
But of course, I already thought of the answer, but for Eric.
I stand here, staring at the thick foggy blue of the bottle, and the pieces slot together in my unwilling mind.
Dray must’ve been in bed when the blackout struck. He went out there to find me… to bring me back to the dorms. And before he left the room, he dabbed that onto his sweater.
So I would know it was him.
Dray believed that I would recognise that cologne to be his.
He thought I believed I was kissinghim, not Eric, grabbinghim, not Eric, fisting my hand inhishair asheknelt…
A jolt pulses through me again, laced with nausea.
I’m assaulted by the memories, fractured flashes strobing in my eyes.
I clench my eyes shut, but still, they come.
I’m unsteady on my feet.
My hand comes up to my head, holding it firm, tears trapped on my lashes, face twisting—but all I see is my finger tracing around his palm in the dark, how it must have convinced him last night, that I knew it was him, that Iwelcomedhim, fingertips tracing on palms just like when we were children trading secret messages in front of the others…
My lips part around a bile-laced breath.
I stagger a step back, the floorboards cold and clammy against my bare feet.
Like I’ve been stupefied, I turn, limbs stiff, and start for the door—and in that first step, my mind trips into a sudden whirl.
I sent the cologne to Dray.
I knelt in my bedroom with Abigail, wrapping gifts as she wrote the cards, but my mind was on Dray, it was on the engagement hidden from me, the blatant disregard from my parents, it was on the crumbling of my life, and I was interrogating Abigail about her perfect fucking life, hooked on the revelations that she’s married and has children, and my own head is so far up my own ass that I didn’t know that, and I still don’t care, I only care that she gets a choice.
And all of that…
In all of that, I fucked up.
I taped the cards on wrong.
I sent Dray the cologne.
But if I did that… that means Eric got the Vacheron Constantin.
Oh shit.
That’s why Eric wanted to know about the gift and if he could still keep it, because it’s so fucking extravagant—
I double over.
A horrible heave retches through me, and I think I’ve been struck in the gut.
It was Dray who caught me into his arms. Who kissed me. Who shoved me up against the wall andconsumedme.
