She shudders, and when I let go, I expect a punch. Instead, she turns and slips her hands around my neck, the move shocking me for a second.
I pull her closer without hesitation, my hands coming to rest on her plump arse as we move together on the dance floor.
I lift a hand and push a strand of hair from her face, as I bend down and my lips meet hers.
I force my tongue into her mouth. She resists at first, but then she relents, granting access, and I am fucking her mouth without restraint.
It is tongue and teeth and blood, whose, I don’t know. My gorgeous girl has claws of her own. She bites, she sucks.
We lose ourselves in the kiss. It is everything.
I pour all of it into her.
The obsession… the madness.
Mine.
This woman is fucking mine.
Chapter 34
Octavia
My legs are shaky, but I still manage to slip out through the back.
I am, indeed, a coward when it comes to Markev.
After our kiss, and damn it, what a kiss, I push him away and escape through the back door.
It opens into a narrow, unlit alley.
I lean against the wall for a moment, steadying myself. My pulse is wild, and my head is spinning.
I take out a cigarette from the pack I bought earlier and light it with shaking fingers.
I don’t usually smoke. But when I am wound this tight, when I lose control, I need something. Painting, running until my lungs burn, making someone pay.
I have none of those options right now.
So this will have to do.
The guilt crushing down on me for kissing Markev feels almost absent, and that in itself is unsettling. It is there, hovering, unnervingly still, and the absence of it only fuels more guilt in its place.
Guilt for not feeling enough guilt.
It turns into a relentless back and forth, a vicious spiral, until the noise in my head grows deafening. The voices scream so loudly that, if I had my blade in hand, I might well drive it into my own chest just to make it stop.
Because he makes me feel something no one ever has in my twenty-two years on this earth.
As I look up at the dark sky, I find myself wondering why.
Why him.
And yet a part of me wants to see where this goes, just once, to know what it would be like to let go completely and exist inside the moment. To allow myself to feel everything, all the emotions he seems to awaken in me.
I breathe the smoke in deep, close my eyes, and let it out slowly.
The door opens.
