All the woman grow silent as they stare at me. “The mailman, Tally. Really. You’ve been gone so long you forgot the man who used to deliver you those dirty magazines when you were a teenager.”
“Cosmopolitan?”
“They always had sex tips on the covers,” Rayna says, like she’snot standing next to a three-headed dildo and about to discuss alien dick.
“Wait, wasn’t the mailman like forty back when we were kids?”
My mom nods, and Penny stage-whispers, “Don’t engage with them.” Then to the group, she replies, “Yes. And his wife didn’t die. He just said he wished she would.”
“So you have talked to him about dating!” Babs claps her hands in excitement.
“No!” Penny huffs. “He talks to whoever will listen. He’s in his fifties, and I’m not dating.”
“Okay, fine. I guess he’s too old for you,” Mindy agrees. “But what about Eli?”
“The same Eli who just hit on my sister in a group chat with half the town? Thanks, but no thanks. There’s someoneperfect out there for me, I know that. But he’s not outthere”—she motions to the window outside—“in Hope Harbor. So stop trying to set me up. I’m all set with my book boyfriends for the time being.”
I mouth a “Sorry,” and she shakes her head before pouring more red wine into her glass.
“I mean the book boyfriends do have three dicks, so …” Babs says with a shrug as she stares longingly at the dildo, shimmying like a wind chime on the table.
At that moment, Rosie rushes in from the back. “Sorry I’m late.” When she sees me her face breaks into a big grin. “Yay, you made it!”
Just as she goes to grab a seat, the front door swings open with a loud jangle and a breeze blows in, followed by a grumpy-looking Walker and a smiling Eli.
“What are the two of you doing here?” Penny exclaims.
The men eye each other and then Eli shrugs and throws a thumb in Walker’s direction. “Hewas standing outside. I was just walking by and thought I’d come browse.”
“The sign says closed,” Rosie teases.
“But you’re all here,” he points out.
I glance at Walker, who still hasn’t said anything.
“Well, you’re in luck,” Babs cuts across. “I’ve got an extra copy ofThe Alien Baby Daddy.” She waves a copy of a book with a blue monster standing over a pregnant woman on the cover.Strange. Babs sees my shudder and points a finger at me. “You’ll be eating it up when you find out how many heads he has.”
“Ah, hell,” Walker mutters.
“What kind of heads?” Eli asks, reaching for the book.
Babs drops her gaze down Eli’s body. “Ya know.”
Eli’s hand snaps to the front of his pants as his voice hits the highest note. “Mrs. Wilcox!”
“You asked!”
“Okay, let’s be serious ladies. It’s time to start,” Rayna commands.
I glance at Walker, whose face is scrunched up in a painful scowl.
“You can go, you know,” I offer.
He shakes his head and grabs a chair near the door. “I’ll just be right here. You don’t have a ride home.”
“I can take her.” Eli winks in my direction as he settles in the seat next to me. “I’m sticking around to learn all about the—” He hesitates. “Alien heads.”
“I’m going to the same house becausewe live together,” Walker retorts, annunciating the words in a possessive way that has my stomach doing a little flip. Then he sits down, tips his head forward like the conversation is over, and stares at Rayna.
