Oh well, best to get it over with. I make my way inside and upstairs to extend my trust with the hope that he will give his in return.
When I reach the studio, I don’t wait for permission. I simply make my way inside, determined to prove to him that I can be strong—just as strong as Chantel.As I move through the room, I ask myself,When did this become a competition to me?Nomatter how long I think about that, I still have no answer, and now, the question itself is starting to disturb me. Noticeably, there is no music tonight, just silence. This, for some reason, pleases me.
“You came.” His familiar voice travels across the room. “I wasn’t sure you would.”
Straightening my shoulders, I try to remind myself that he isnotreferring to this afternoon when I brought myself to a spectacular climax fantasizing abouther. No, that dark secret remains solely mine.
I make my way over to where he obviously wants me to stand and turn to him. “Of course I’m here. This is why you invited me to the chateau, correct?”
He tilts his head to the side. “What’s different tonight?”
“Excuse me?” I ask, tugging on the bottom of my shirt, a little nervous now.
This man constantly has me questioning myself. It’s hard to believe that I ever had a moment where I was comfortable enough to let him inside of my body—unless, of course, I hallucinated that whole episode in the vineyard as well. With the way my mind keeps playing tricks on me, it would not surprise me.
“What is different?” he repeats, moving toward me. His long legs cross the space in no time at all. “You seem defensive tonight, like you’re out to prove something…or perhaps you’rehidingsomething.”
Swallowing hard, I clasp my fingers together, fidgeting with my nails. “I’m not hiding anything. How absurd.”
I don’t feel he’s convinced, because those shrewd eyes narrow as he licks his bottom lip.
“Maybe I’m defensive because you challenged me this afternoon.Will you be wearing your armor?Does that ring a bell?” I snap in a tone far bitchier than I expect.
His silence is unnerving, his stare unwavering, as he slowly shakes his head. “No. That’s not it. You’re hiding something.”
Clenching my jaw, I stay stubbornly quiet until he finally turns and walks back to where he set up his paints.
“So, take off all my clothes, then? We can’t work in sections?” I ask, trying to decide what he wants.
“No, we can’t work in sections. You need to remove it all.”
“Can’t I leave my pants on until you are ready for that part?”
An eyebrow goes up as he states very calmly, “No, Gemma, you know better. The piece is full nude—unless, of course, you aren’t brave enough. I don’t understand the problem. I have seen it all before.”
I curse my own insecurities. I’m not sure if I’m ready to be so vulnerable and so exposed to him again. I reach down, unbuckle my pants, and unzip them quickly, pushing them to the floor. I kick them to the side with a little more force than necessary.
“I suppose you need these off as well?” I ask in a surly tone.
Phillipe looks at my fingers, which are touching the lace of my white panties. “Of course.”
I roll my eyes. It figures he would find a way to make me feel like I just asked a stupid question. I’ve started to unbutton my shirt when I realize he is still standing there. He patiently watches me with intense eyes, pulling his lips into a pensive line.
I raise my eyes to his and decide to try to lighten the mood. “So, I’m just supposed to bare my soul to you?”
“Well, you’re asking me to bare mine.”
Contemplating his terse reply, I reach back to undo the clasp of my bra. “That’s true in a sense, but whatyouare doing and what I am about to do are two completely different things.”
His eyes have moved, focusing on my breasts and my arms, which are paused behind my back for the moment.
“Yet each of those two things requires an enormous amount of trust,” he reminds me.
I can see that he’s trying to teach me a lesson—something along the lines of:You blew my trust this morning by thinking I would hurt you, so take off your shirt, and maybe I’ll forgive you.
“So, are you willing to trust me?”
I unhook the bra and slowly lower it, revealing my aching breasts to him. Moving my arm to the side, I drop the piece of lingerie on the floor.
