CHAPTER 1
London
March 1824
Beingin love was highly overrated.
In Lady Sophie Carlisle’s case, it meant twitching every time someone walked past the doorway of the drawing room where she was visiting with her best friend because there was the slightest possibility that the person could be the subject of her unrequited affection: Mr. Nicholas Blackwell.
Sophie was tragically besotted and not very good at hiding it. If she didn’t know this fact already, the sympathetic glance from Lady Kate Blackwell—her beloved’s sister-in-law—would be enough to make it clear.
“Stop jumping at every noise,” Kate said, her hand pausing over the sketchbook she was drawing in. “It won’t make Nicholas more likely to appear.”
Sophie feigned nonchalance as she flipped through the pages of her music book until she found a song she knew. “I blame you for the awful state of my nerves. You made falling in love look far more appealing than it actually is.”
Kate and her husband, Lord Theodore Blackwell, weredisgustingly smitten with each other. No one who saw them together could possibly doubt their devotion, and the secret smiles they sent each other had made Sophie long for the same.
No, she didn’t want Theodore himself. He was far too reserved for her.
But his brother would do nicely.
“The ideal scenario is to fall in love with someone who returns the sentiment.” Kate’s voice was soft, making Sophie glad that she hadn’t met her friend’s gaze. She didn’t think she could stand the pity she might find there.
She knew that Nicholas didn’t feel for her as she did for him, but she did her best to ignore that. If she acknowledged it, the constant ache in her chest might become unbearable.
Sophie shrugged delicately. “I have never been one to do things the easy way.”
Kate laughed. “That’s true enough.”
Angling her face toward the window, Sophie basked in the sun streaming through and warming her skin. It was only spring, but all traces of winter had disappeared days ago. Many said it would be a long, hot summer, which Sophie wouldn’t mind at all. She preferred the warmth.
She skimmed her fingers over the piano keys, settling them into position, the familiar pose as easy as breathing.
“Have you met any gentlemen of interest this season?” Kate asked. In her peripheral vision, Sophie noticed that Kate’s hand had begun to move again. “Any marriage prospects?”
Sophie grimaced. Ugh, as if it weren’t frustrating enough that her mother constantly hounded her about choosing a suitable husband. Kate no doubt meant well. She just wanted Sophie to be as happy as she was. But Sophie couldn’t simply extinguish her feelings for Nicholas and choose to focus them on someone who might actually marry her.
“Not in particular,” she said, then allowed her fingers tofall into the rhythm of the song she’d chosen. Too late, she realized it was a romantic ballad.
Lord, was there to be no mercy for her poor battered heart?
Determined not to show her regret, Sophie gritted her teeth and breathed deeply. She could get through this song without shedding a tear. There was no reason to sink into the emotional state she usually occupied while playing. She could keep this mechanical.
Her heart throbbed, heavy and tight, and she swallowed, a lump burning down the back of her throat.
Everything was fine.
She was fine.
There was no reason to fall apart.
The song’s melody flowed around her, encircling her like a persistent suitor, prodding at her weak points and testing her armor for defenses.
It was difficult to resist the urge to let the music sweep her away. Usually, she didn’t bother trying, so her ability to withstand the beauty and richness of the notes wasn’t as strong as she’d like.
Finally, the song ended. She immediately yanked her hands from the keys and closed the music book.
“May I see what you’re working on?” she asked, turning toward Kate.
