“No, of course not. I just think it’s better if I go,” he says, his tone serious as he seems to metaphorically distance himself from me even further.
I hesitate and chew on my bottom lip. “Are you sure? It just seemed like one second we were joking and laughing, and then the next...” I shrug. “I don’t even know. I just don’t want things to be weird between us.”
His jaw tightens, and it’s obvious he's holding something back, which is not him at all, at least not when it comes to us.
The room somehow feels like it’s holding its breath with me, the air thick and heavy and I hate it. He can say all he wants that things are normal, but that doesn’t somehow erase whatever’s simmering here between us.
Finally, he takes a step forward and reaches for my waist, pulling me back toward him. The second his body meets mine, something inside me softens and relaxes, as though it somehow knows this is exactly where I belong.
Ugh, when did I become the needy one in this relationship?
“We’re good, Holls. I just have a lot on my mind.”
“Oh.” My hopeful eyes search his for the truth. I suppose he had seemed a bit distracted at dinner, but I’d naively brushed it off as him being tired after a long day of practice. “You know, I have been told I’m a pretty good listener.”
“I believe it,” he says with a weak smile as his usual gentleness returns. “And I guess I probably should have told you earlier, but I wasn’t sure if now was the right time to bring this up. Hell, I’m still not sure.”
“Wait.” I lean back, angling my chin to look up at him. “Everything’s okay, right?”
Have I really been so self-absorbed that I somehow missed something so big and important happening in his life?
“Yeah, things are fine. Great actually.” He forces a smile that doesn’t quite land. Sure, the words sound convincing, but his stiff shoulders and the lack of eye contact make the disconnect obvious.
“So why am I having a hard time believing you?”
He lets out both a long and loud exhale. “It’s complicated.”
“Then let’s uncomplicate it together,” I suggest, even if it sounds a bit more like begging. “Please. Just tell me what’s going on.”
He hesitates before letting it all spill out. “Right before I got to your office tonight I received a phone call from my agent. Apparently he’s been contacted by a few different Major League teams about getting me to sign with them as soon as my contract with the Honky Tonks ends.”
“Wow,” I say, my lips parting in shock before tilting up into a smile. “That’s huge, Fletch. Congrats!”
“You really think so?” he asks, his voice lacking the same level of enthusiasm.
“Of course I do. This is amazing!” I say, placing my hands on his cheeks. “Why wouldn’t this be good news?”
“I mean,” he shrugs again, tilting his head to the side as my hands fall to rest on his shoulders. “Obviously it is.”
“Okay, but?”
“Like I said earlier. It’s complicated.” He takes a step back, but thankfully, this time, he reaches for my hand as he leads us toward the stools. He takes a seat before pulling me to stand between his legs. “This is what I’ve always wanted, or at least I figured it was, but now I’m not so sure.”
He places his hands on my hips, as I rest mine on his shoulders, before one drifts toward the back of his neck. It’s obvious this man is wrought with tension, and I plan to dowhatever I can to ease it as I kneed my hand against his skin in soft, soothing circles.
“I’ve told you before about how joining the Honky Tonks changed my life, and while I love playing for this team, even with all the sponsorships I’ve managed to land, none of them would even come close to comparing to what I’d make playing for a Major League team,” he continues with a sigh, his eyes closing as he leans into my touch.
“Well, money isn’t everything,” I suggest, my fingers threading into his hair as I massage the back of his head
With his eyes still closed, he nods. “Of course not. But would I be letting myself down if I don’t take the job? Sure, I love playing for the Honky Tonks, but will I regret it if I don’t even try to move on?”
“I don’t know, and unfortunately, I think you’re the only one who can really answer that.”
I’ll always have a strong loyalty to my dad and the amazing league he’s created, but even he would understand why one of his players would want to take this opportunity. Hell, he had the same dream and took it himself.
“And then, of course, there’s us to think about,” he says, interrupting my thoughts.
My fingers immediately halt their movement. “Us? Wait. I…I,” I stammer, unable to form a complete sentence. “I don’t have anything to do with this decision. We’re just frie—”
