“You are brilliant.” Leaning in, she kissed him quickly, then sat back, her gaze bouncing around. “Sorry, I got carried away.”
“I like when you get carried away. You should do it more often.”
More people drifted to their seats, and Carli was dismayed to see Priscilla sitting two seats over from Blake. Her dress was cut low in the front and had a cut out that dipped all the way down her back. It dripped with far more jewels than Carli’s did, and the jewels in her ears and on her neck had to be real. They glimmered every time she moved.
The meal was delicious, but she barely tasted it. The more people around her chatted and conversed, the more she felt like she didn’t belong here. Not just because she was deaf and had a hard time following what they were saying, but because this elegant, wealthy world was so far removed from what she was used to. The snatches of chatter she caught around the table was focused on fancy cars, stylish clothes, and vacations on yachts or in exotic locations. Her family had made it as far as Bar Harbor a few times, and they’d stayed in a tent because it was all they could afford.
Priscilla made a show of greeting her, speaking loudly and pursing her lips in a farce of speech. Other than that, she didn’t acknowledge her, though the way she whispered in people’s ears, turned her head, or covered her mouth with her long, manicured fingers, it was apparent she was playing a control game. Every now and then, Priscilla would glance in their direction and a sly smile would cross her lips. What did Blake ever see in her? Aside from the gorgeous body, hair, face, and the fact his parents loved her.
After dinner and the brief speeches, Blake took her on the dance floor for one dance, then continued to schmooze the rich donors. The pediatric unit was important to him, and she loved seeing him so expressive about his desire to get the best equipment for it. Unfortunately, it made for a lonely night. Often, it seemed like he’d forgotten she was there, even to the point of startling once when she put her hand on his arm to let him know she was heading to the ladies’ room.
Once she was done and had tidied her appearance, she had a quick chat with Priya, who was also on donor duty. Blake had disappeared from his previous position, so she waited near a pillar and glanced around trying to find him.
A tap on her arm had her spinning and smiling. Keeping the smile on her face once she realized it was Audrey Wentworth and not her son was challenging.
“You did a beautiful job with the decorations. Blake tells me you arranged for all this.”
“Yes, thank you, Carline. It is a job one must do in my position and perhaps a good reason for my apprehension where you and Blake are concerned.”
“What does this benefit have to do with Blake and me?” Did she truly want to know the answer?
“This is the type of thing that a doctor’s wife needs to be good at, and not that you couldn’t help out in some ways, but with your disability, you’d have a difficult time making arrangements and contacting people. Blake mentioned you don’t even use the phone.”
“I use my phone all the time.”
Audrey’s hand waved the air in dismissal. “To text, yes. But events like this need better communication.”
Carli couldn’t think of a good response. She remained silent, wishing the floor would open and swallow her up. Where the heck had Blake gotten to?
“The thing is, dear,” Audrey gently touched Carli’s arm. “Blake can’t also have his children be handicapped, especially if his wife is. He has enough responsibility as it is without needing to take care of those who can’t.”
Did this woman honestly think Carli couldn’t take care of herself? She kept using the dreaded words “handicapped” and “disability”. Inhaling deep, she tried to find the words to defend herself and her community.
Audrey started talking again. “He understands that a long-term relationship with you wouldn’t be prudent. He can’t risk having another disabled child in the family. Or heaven forbid, more than one. You do understand his position, don’t you? It’s new and fun now, learning this sign language, but it won’t last. I haven’t seen him signing all night. Could be the newness has already faded. Do think about that, dear. But for now, enjoy the night.”
All she could do was stare as Audrey waltzed away onto her next target.They’donly have their money taken away. Carli had been stripped of her pride.
Did Blake really feel that way? He’d have said something, right? Best find him and see. Audrey was most likely blowing smoke.
It took almost ten minutes before her gaze landed on the handsome doctor. Still talking up his cause. Moving slowly through the crowd, she watched as Blake conversed. Once she got to his side, he glanced down, smiled, and continued as if she hadn’t been missing for a half hour.
As the night progressed, Carli grew more anxious. The high ceilings played havoc with her processors, and a headache started in the back of her head. The talk centered on the hospital, as she expected it would, but also on the medical community at large. Common clubs they joined and restaurants they frequented. Trying to follow it was daunting, when someone mumbled or put their hand near their mouth in particular.
One of the audiologists joined them, and Carli straightened up, gazing back and forth, tipping her head to get as much of the chatter as possible. This was something she was interested in. Her job. It still didn’t work. Too many people all trying to speak at once. How could they expect her to follow along?
Touching Blake’s arm, she whispered, “What did he say?” to a specific question that was asked.
The rest of the conversation didn’t stop, and in a second, Blake looked down at her and shook his head. “It doesn’t matter.” Immediately, he jumped back in with his own opinion.
It doesn’t matter. What he actually meant was thatshedidn’t matter. She hadn’t mattered all night. She was well aware that this was business and he’d be required to schmooze with the benefactors, but couldn’t he have made a tiny attempt to help her comprehend what was going on? Had he only asked her to be arm decoration? She worked in the hospital and was aware of medical issues. She was getting her master’s degree in hospital administration, for Pete’s sake. Did her thoughts and opinions not matter? Or was it too hard to make sure she could understand what was said?
The longer she stood there, the longer she realized maybe his mother was right. She wasn’t the kind of woman Blake needed. What had ever made her think she was? From the first moment they met, she could tell she wasn’t in his league and that he had issues with people who couldn’t hear. Tonight proved she was totally out of her element.
But Blake wants to be with you. He bought a charger for your processor batteries and everything.
He did, and that was sweet. But why had he done it? To help her? More likely so he didn’t need to sign as much. It could be that Audrey was correct, and the bloom was off the rose when it came to using ASL. He certainly hadn’t used it since he’d seen her in her dress tonight.
And how often did he use sign with her? Mostly when they were alone. He hadn’t used it much at the wedding. The wedding that had been one of their only times out in public together, aside from tonight. Was he embarrassed by her? There had been no attempt at all tonight to help her understand what people were saying. She was expected to stand next to him and look pretty. No, that wasn’t what she wanted in life. They needed to talk. Alone.
