“Didn’t do anything.”
“You listened. I appreciate it.”
“Any time.” Standing, Rico swung his bag onto his back and checked his watch. “Let’s head to the Overlook before descending.”
“Sounds good.”
As they hiked, Rico asked what they’d done Saturday, and Theo filled him in on the activities, as well as the curious stares they’d gotten from a number of residents.
“Nosy people. Did you end up staying in Sunday to avoid that?”
“Jordan had a birthday party yesterday for one of her school friends, so we didn’t see her mom. But I got more of the same while I was there. That divorced mother I told you about? She had lots of questions about Chelsea.”
Rico smirked. “The one you said is always inviting Jordan over to play but insists you stick around while the kids have fun?”
“Yeah, that’s the one. Good thing Jordan isn’t best friends with that kid, or I’d be in trouble.”
They spent the next few hours hiking the trails, stopping every now and then to clean off or reset the trail markers. Clouds rolled in, and the day grew chilly. Hopefully, Chelsea’s heat was working.
“You know, when I first met Chelsea, she was so filled with life, so happy to be here and with me.” The words escaped his mouth before he realized. Pausing, Rico looked his way and smiled, so he went on. Maybe he needed to talk it out.
“Everything was new to her. She devoured life. I know she grew up sheltered, and now I know exactly how much so, but she blossomed when she was here, even with the sadness of losing her grandmother. Now…” He stared at the gray sky and felt darkness invade his soul. “She’s this shell of a woman I don’t even know. When we went out Saturday, I’d see parts of her emerge, but then she’d revert to this meek, scared stranger.”
“What do you want to happen, Theo?”
Shaking his head, he mulled over that thought. “I want to go back in time and keep her from leaving. I thought she’d only be gone for a short visit. It’s what she thought, too, but neither one of us could ever have imagined what her father was capable of.”
The wind picked up, and he zipped his jacket higher. “I should have trusted her. Trusted that she loved me. Things didn’t feel right, but I let my stupid pride get in the way. She was only twenty and innocent. I allowed myself to believe that it had all been a fun adventure for her, that once she realized she’d have to live in my tiny house and on my meager salary, she’d had second thoughts. Why the heck didn’t I trust her?”
His heart beat in his chest rapidly, like he’d been running at full tilt. His friend merely stood, listening to him rant.
“The least I should have done was see her face to face. Make her tell me in person that she didn’t love me, didn’t want to be married to me. I should have pushed harder to see her.”
Except he hadn’t, and now he wondered if she would forgive him. Not only had she lost him, she’d been made to think her child had died. She’d lost four years of her daughter’s life. Why hadn’t he fought harder?
Rico gripped his shoulder. “You can’t change any of that. You need to look forward. What do you want now? Ideally?”
“I want her back, Rico. In my life and in Jordan’s life. I want her to move in and be my wife in every sense of the word.”
“She doesn’t want that?”
“I haven’t asked her.”
Throwing his hands in the air, Rico growled, “Why not? Maybe it’s what she wants, too.”
What the heck was he doing? “We were only married for two weeks. Had only known each other for four months. I keep asking myself if I imagined how we felt for each other, if I haven’t built it up bigger than it actually was. I guess I’m afraid to get my heart ripped apart again. The few times I’ve pushed forward, she seems to back away, like she’s scared.”
“Her heart’s been ripped apart, too. You weren’t the only one hurt.”
“I know. I have to wonder if she blames me. Maybe she can’t forgive me. I didn’t trust her, and I let her down. The result was Jordan spending the first four years of her life without a mother, a mother who obviously loved her. My baby girl suffered because of me.”
“Jordan loves you, man.”
“I know.” Taking a deep breath in, Theo stared at his feet. “Sorry for dumping all this on you.”
“What are friends for? Sometimes you gotta vent or you’ll blow.”
He shook his head and closed his eyes. Now that he’d talked it out, he did feel a bit better. However, he was still unsure about what he should do.
