A treat, I realize, once Bear listens and gives it to him.
I click onto another, then another, watching him care for me through ups and downs and earning Bear’s trust with treats and toys.
He takes him outside and plays with him.
Some of the videos show him touching and teasing me, but most show him just spending time with us, with me, of course, unaware.
Why did he keep the ones he didn’t touch me in?
I click on the one I watched before with him. August 9th.
I clearly ask for more, and yet I remember none of this.
Leaning in, I watch the way he fucks me slowly. Deliberately. It’s like he knows he needs to savor me.
I’m shifting in my chair as my body temperature rises, my thighs pressing together.
“Poison?” I hear from the doorway.
Startled, I accidentally flung the mouse to the floor. It shatters as I stand, and the chair rolls backward.
I smash all the buttons on the keyboard, trying to get my moans to stop sounding through the room.
“God, I’m so sorry. I’ll buy you another one.” I crouch to pick up the pieces, and he walks closer.
Dropping before me, he swats my hands away from the mess, lifting his fingers to tip my chin back. “What were you doing?”
“Getting to know you,” I blurt. “You know me, but I don’t know you. You stole that from me.”
He eyes the video I was watching. “You watched that one three times. What did you learn?”
I swallow.
How long had he been standing there?
“You savored me. Like I was delicate. Like it was the only time you were going to fuck me.”
“I savored you because of how you felt. Because I had no fucking choice; your cunt felt so good gripping me.”
“Come to bed.” He grabs my hand and leads me toward the door.
When we get back into the bedroom, he turns me toward him. Slowly, delicately, he undoes my braid, flicking the hair tie through the dark room.
“Hey!” I protest.
“No.”
He tugs me toward the bed and tucks in behind me, tossing a leg over my hip as his breathing evens.
“You took care of me when I was sick,” I say.
“Mm. More than once.”
“Why?”
“You’re mine. I take care of my things.”
Stupidly, I smile as I shut my eyes.
