Lexi ignores this.
‘Granny Bridget cries a lot. And Granny Betty’s nervous,’ says Lexi as if she wants to find flaws in this excess of relatives. The relative she wishes would care, simply doesn’t.
‘I know, but if you had Dad and Zed as sons and they always wanted to do triathlons and things – you know how Zed is into parachute jumping – you might be a bit nervous, too.’
Lexi manages a small laugh.
‘I’m telling you,’ I add, now that I was on a roll, ‘I will be stressed out of my head if you decided that you want to do rock climbing or parachuting when you are older.’
‘Ugh,’ she says with a shudder. ‘I don’t want to do anything like that. I want to dance.’
‘Perfect, lovely you want to dance. And don’t forget you’ve got Scarlett, Maura, Pip, Zed, Caitlin, Gilly and everyone.’
‘Why can’t Scarlett have babies?’ she asks me suddenly and I’m taken aback at this suddenvolte face.
‘Because not everyone gets what they want in life,’ I say ‘and for poor Scarlett and Jack, they tried so hard and they haven’t been able to have babies.’
‘And people like Elisa who had me when she was young, they get babies but they can’t look after them?’ she questions.
Out of the mouths of babes.
‘Life is very strange, darling,’ I say to her, ‘never quite works out the way we want it to. But when we have people who love us and when we know we can talk to those people, tell them all our fears and know they will always love us no matter what, we can get through most things.’
She throws her slim arms around my waist and squeezes as tight as she can and I bury my lips in her gleaming dark hair. I can’t cry, not yet, although I want to. My beautiful girl is having to deal with so much.
‘Now let’s think about what you might say to Elisa next time you see her and—’
‘I don’t want to see her again,’ says Lexi suddenly, pulling back from me.
‘OK,’ I said.
But she needs to,says Mildred.
Mildred is being surprisingly helpful.
‘I think it would be great to see Elisa. In fact,’ and I don’t know where this idea comes from, ‘I think we should visit your other Granny and Granddad, her mum and dad, have them to dinner. Nothing fancy and she can bring whoever she’s going out with.’
I’m still not entirely sure who the baby Daddy is.
‘He’s a musician,’ says Lexi.
‘OK,’ I say, vowing then and there to seriously cut down on Lexi’s time on social media. I know it’s going to be like fighting against the sea, but still. She needs a little bit more childhood before she has to face up to the weird and wonderful world of the internet. ‘So let’s organise that. I’ll ask Granny Adele.’
‘Elisa says they’re nice, really rich though. They have a dog, Coco. We could get a dog.’
I grin. ‘Have you and Liam been planning this?’ I say, suddenly feeling my feet on very familiar territory. ‘It’s a plan isn’t it? Everything that’s going on, just to get a dog.’
Lexi laughs and suddenly she’s back, my beautiful girl, not so little anymore, growing up, facing difficult things, but her eyes are shining as she looks at me.
‘We could get a small dog. I promise to walk it.’
‘I’m not so sure about you walking it all by yourself,’ I say, ‘but certainly you and Liam can be involved in,’ I grin, ‘picking up the doggie poo.’
‘No,’ she shrieks.
‘Yes, doggie poo, it’s the only answer,’ I say. ‘Now, don’t look at any more Elisa videos – in fact, text Caitlin to say that everything’s all right and I might hold onto your phone for the rest of the evening? We’ll figure out how we’re going to invite Elisa over and say we’re pleased for her news. And Dad will be happy that she’s happy.’
Lexi looked at me with a sceptical gaze.
