‘Whydidn’tyou discuss it?’ said Callie and then thoughtpot, kettle, black. Why hadn’t she confronted Jason? Because she didn’t want to hear what he had to say. Hearing him say the words and imagining it going on were two very different things to deal with.
Evelyn sighed. ‘I didn’t want to, that’s why. I was stupid and needy. I wanted to be with Rob because I loved him. I told myself that we had kids together and a history ... Eventually, I ran out of space in my head for all the lies. One Friday afternoon, when we were all supposed to be going to a pizza restaurant that night, he rang to say he’d had to fly to London suddenly and he’d be away till Sunday.’
Evelyn stared into the distance, remembering.
‘I just flipped. I yelled at him that I was sick of his girlfriends and all the lying. He blustered, told me I was wrong and I hung up. Gave him time. Time to choose. Time to get on the plane and come back home. To us.’
Callie reached over and grabbed her friend’s hand. She knew what had happened.
Rob hadn’t come home. He’d stayed away.
‘Rob was an idiot, Evelyn, you know that.’
‘Yes, but I have to pretend it was all mutual to the kids because you can’t punish them,’ Evelyn said with the fluidity of someone who had told herself this often enough. ‘Although I’d say the poor counsellor I saw is now deaf from all my screeching. But I didn’t screech at home with the boys. I went off-site. That’s important – keep your nervous breakdown out of the house.’
Evelyn laughed without humour.
‘Tell me about it,’ she went on. ‘Gut instinct?’
Callie sipped a bit of her coffee.
‘My gut says something’s up and what else can it be? It’s hard to put my finger on it, but Jason has been working late a lot and he’s stressed. His picture is under the words “emotionally absent” in the dictionary.’
She realised she felt relieved to be saying this out loud.
‘He’s been away for a few weekends and he never used to work weekends, never.’
They both considered this.
Callie backtracked a bit.
‘Of course, you know how he loves going out and how he and Rob liked to have a dinner together once a month with us,’ she said, feeling suddenly guilty because once upon a time it had been Evelyn and Rob at those dinners and now it was Rob and the much younger Anka.
‘It’s OK, you can say it,’ said Evelyn. ‘I’m over Rob, it’s fine. I know you guys go out because he’ll phone and mention it, and I go out into the garden and pour salt on the slugs eating my plants. Great for inner rage.’
They both laughed.
‘Callie, I honestly don’t think that Jason has been cheating on you. I think I’d know.’
‘How would you?’ said Callie, desperate for consolation.
‘Rob and I talk all the time, mainly about the kids but he goes on about work and I think there’s something hassling them with the office right now. I honestly think that’s it and trust me, I would tell you if I thought Jason was seeing someone.’
She was quiet for a moment as if considering how to put this. ‘Rob’s a good liar but I’d pick up on it if he was hiding something about Jason. And he’s always admired you. He talks about you, Jason and Poppy like you’re a perfect family.’ Evelyn smiled wryly. ‘I think he fancied you a million years ago. I used to feel jealous of you in the early days.’
‘No,’ said Callie stunned.
‘I did actually,’ said Ev, ‘sorry. It’s really stupid, but you’re so beautiful and had such an exotic background—’
‘What? Ballyglen and a council house?’ said Callie, laughing with relief and disbelief combined.
‘You hid that very well, honey,’ said Evelyn. ‘I felt totally intimidated until I met you and got to know you – obviously.’
‘Got to know what a fake I was behind all that mysterious facade,’ said Callie, smiling genuinely for the first time since they’d left the Pilates class.
‘Rob always tells me about the nights out you four have together.’
‘Ouch.’ Callie grimaced. ‘That is thoughtless in a whole new dimension. Apart from that first time I had to meet Anka and I told you so, I never discuss the dinners in case it hurts you and besides, you know I’d far rather be out with you.’
