Tania’s breath caught in the throat.She wanted to say yes.She wanted to tell him that’s what she wanted to, but what would everyone think?She’d just been married to Rod, and had what everyone thought was his baby.But everyone would know different soon.She knew life in a small town, as soon as the paperwork was processed by the court, someone wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to share all the details, or what they knew—that Carter wasn’t Rod’s.
She looked up and met Smokey’s gaze.
“I want that too.”She did her best to smile but wasn’t sure how well she succeeded.She shoved her hands into her jacket pockets to keep him from seeing how badly she shook, not from cold, though it was pretty chilly out here, but from nerves.“I can help.”She let out a mirthless laugh.“I just found out I’ve got a lot of money.What can I do to help?”
“Keep it.I’m not after your money, Shell.I don’t care about it.I can take care of us.If there was no money, I wouldn’t give a flying fuck.Do whatever you want with it.Set up college funds for the kids, build a monument to yourself, give it all away, I don’t care.”
She leaned forward and pressed her face against his shoulder as she fought back the tears that threatened to fall.
“What do you say?Will you marry me?”
“I can’t.I’m not even divorced yet.I haven’t even signed the paperwork to file.”And yet, she’d slept with him a few hours ago.What kind of woman did that make her?What kind of mother?That reminded her.“You said my parents took some of the money too.Are you sure about that?”She knew he was sure, she just needed to hear him say it again.
“Baby, I’m sure.They got part of the payout.And if they hadn’t planned on it all along, why didn’t you know about the money?”
She’d thought about the same thing.Now she had to figure out what she would say to her parents, or if she said anything.She was sorely tempted to just cut them off.If they’d done this to her, what else had they done that she still didn’t know about?Did she want Carter growing up thinking that kind of treachery and betrayal was normal or acceptable?That answer was easy.No.
“As for your divorce, it will happen, it’s just a matter of time.We can keep our plans to ourselves as long as you like, and you don’t even have to answer me now, but I want to know you’re not walking away again.”
She stared up at him.“I’m through running, Tim.”
“You don’t have to be.I just want to be sure that when you run, you’re running back to me.I’ll take care of you, I’ll protect you, I’ll stand between you and the world if that’s what you need.”
Tania took a deep breath and held it for a moment before she spoke, she wanted to get the words right and that took a moment to consider each one.
“I don’t want anyone but you.I never have.I married Rod because that’s what my parents wanted.I’m through living my life to suit other people.”She took another deep breath, met his gaze and held it.“I’ll marry you.But I’ve got to get divorced first.”She glanced back toward the clubhouse, though all she could see was the copse of trees they’d walked past on the way out here.“We should probably go see if Fletch sent that paperwork over.”
“We can if you want, but when I was signing the custody papers for Carter, Hawkeye said even if they come in now, there won’t be time to get them to the courthouse and filed tonight.”
Tania let her shoulders fall.She’d been hoping to get it done and filed today.To be one step closer and at least feel like she was making progress.
“Hey, it’s not all bad.”Smokey wrapped his arms around her and tugged her close.“He was sending someone to the courthouse to put the custody paperwork in a judge’s hand.Then when it’s time, we’ll do the same with your paperwork.It will go through quickly, trust me.”
“I do trust you.You and the rest of the Angels are about the only people I feel like I can trust.”
“That’s okay, Shell.We’ll always be here for you.”
“Thank you.”She buried her face against his neck and stood there, letting him hold her, until she got so cold, despite his warmth so close, that she couldn’t stop shivering, then he took her back to the clubhouse to warm up.
