Chapter Twenty-Five
At a loss for whatelse to do, Smokey held Tania while she cried.He knew she needed to get it out before she could look at things and start to move on.He much rather when she had some crazy blow up about something stupid.Anger he could handle, her tears tore him up.
As he held her, he couldn’t help but wonder if Taylynn had seen her make her way through the common room and had known this was coming.Was this why she’d taken Carter almost as soon as he’d come in.
“W-Where’s Carter?”Tania hiccupped.
“With Taylynn.She snagged him as soon as I came in with him.Said she needed to practice.I was worried about you, so I didn’t question it.Did she say something to you?”
“Honestly?I don’t know.”She was quiet for a moment.“I was so lost in my head I don’t know who was in the common room or if they said anything to me.”
“Feeling better?”
“Kinda.It doesn’t hurt anymore, or at least not as bad.I’m kind of numb now.”She rolled over to face him.“Is this how it’s supposed to feel?”
“I don’t know, baby.I think we all feel a little different, and all we can do is deal with it as it comes.I’m pretty sure that even if it’s stopped hurting now, it will hurt again, maybe as much as today, maybe not.But I can tell you one thing for sure.”
“What?”
“I’ll be there for you, no matter what.If it hurts, I’ll hold you while you cry.If it makes you angry, I’ll take the hits until you can handle it.Whatever you need, Shell.I’ll be here for you.Not just for you either.You.Carter.Any other kids we may have.I want it all, baby.”He held his breath as he waited to see what she would say.
She stared at him.As if she wasn’t sure what to say.
“I know you’re probably not ready.We’ll get there.First though, is the divorce.Let’s go talk to Hawkeye, see what he can tell us.We might need to call in Dagger or maybe call Fletch to get him to decode all the legalese, but we’ll figure it out.First thing is the divorce, assuming you want to continue with that.”His last words lilted at the end, asking her if she really wanted a divorce.
“I do.I can’t stay with him.If I’d known about the money, I would have left months ago.But I thought I was stuck.”
Smokey tightened his hold on her.
“I know things are up in the air and scary right now.You’re just getting out of an abusive relationship and people will tell you that you need time to breathe, to find yourself again.I’ll try to give you all the space I can, Shell, but there’s so much to consider here baby.”He spoke into her hair, hoping she wouldn’t interrupt or argue.He needed to get this out and didn’t know if he could if she stopped him before he had his say.It hadn’t escaped him that she didn’t say anything when he’d told her he wanted her, he wanted more kids, that he wanted it all, and he didn’t know if it was too much too soon or if she was just afraid to tell him no, at least until they had the current threat taken care of.“I just want to keep you safe.Both of you.I don’t want to control you, Shell.I never have.I love your spirit, I love everything about you and I always have.”He fought the urge to hold on to her, to never let her out of his arms.Instead he kept his hold snug but not restrictive.He wanted his touch to tell her he was there.He would support her but he wouldn’t hold her back.He could only hope she understood.
The Angels might have Werner Jr in a cell in the basement, but Sr.was still out there, and Sr was the one who had shot the prospects.Smokey wouldn’t take any risks with his family until both threats were neutralized.Whatever it took.
