This child will know none of that. Only love. Only safety. Only two parents who would burn the world down to keep them safe.
I'll make sure of it. We both will.
I need to see my doctor. Confirm this with bloodwork, with an examination. Home tests can be wrong. I need to make certain before I let my emotions run away with me.
A small laugh bubbles up inside me despite my attempt to think logically, to process this in a rational, calm way.
Holy shit. I’m pregnant.
It’s not something we’ve talked about or planned for yet, other than in nebulous terms that never held a firm shape. Our future has always been the two of us. Now, suddenly, we are three.
How will Nick feel about this? It isn’t something I want to tell him over the phone. After last night, I’m not even sure how to tell him.
What if he isn’t ready for a baby? What if he’s at his office right now wondering if he’s even ready to be a husband in three weeks?
It’s not that I doubtus. But we need to find our way back to solid ground again. I want him to come back to me because he can't stand the distance. Because he needs me the way I need him. BecauseI'menough to bridge whatever opened between us last night.
Not because a baby changed the calculus.
Am I prepared to be a mother? Do I even know how?
The thoughts fill me with something too large to name. Joy and terror and wonder, all braided together.
My palm presses against my stomach, holding the secret I should be able to share with Nick right this second. We'll be okay. I know we will.
Wehaveto be. Now more than ever.
I just wish he was here to say those words to me, instead of leaving me alone to wonder whether this news will pull us closer or push him further away.
12
NICK
My phone sits darkon the corner of my desk. I've lost track of how many times I checked it in the last hour alone. Nothing from Avery. She usually texts me some little greeting or message every day before she starts her morning. But not today.
I can’t blame her. I was an asshole last night. She is the most important thing in my life, yet I frightened her with my harsh words and raised voice, then let her go to bed alone. I should’ve opened that damned bedroom door and made sure we talked things through.
Instead, I walked away like a fucking coward and now it feels like a wall has been constructed between us. A wall of my own making.
"Nick." Beck taps his pen against the contract. He’s been talking about earn-out clauses on a pending acquisition deal we’ve been working on for weeks, and I’ve barely heard a word. "The timeline they're proposing is aggressive, but workable. If we counter with a twenty-four-month window and adjust the performance thresholds, we can close by end of quarter. What do you think?"
"Sounds fine."
He glances up, studying me a long moment. Finally he leans forward, pointing to draw my attention to another clause. "They want board representation. Two seats, non-voting."
"Fine."
I don’t bother to read the terms he’s indicating. I don’t really give a shit about this deal right now. My real world—the one that revolves around Avery—feels as if it’s on the verge of imploding while I’m sitting here pretending I care about adding another acquisition to my portfolio.
“They also want a change-of-control kicker for senior management. Not unreasonable.”
“Yeah, fine. Whatever.”
"And they'd like you to sign over the penthouse, all of your cars, and your firstborn child."
My head snaps up. Beck's watching me with a look that says he’s just proven his point. The bastard.
"You haven't heard a single thing I've said." He sets down his pen. "So let's skip the part where you pretend to review forty million dollars’ worth of acquisition terms while you're somewhere else entirely. You look like hell, by the way."
